Give Us a Shot
by ILoveHarmony
Summary: A heartfelt conversation with Hermione leaves Harry with questions of "What if" and an answer that will change the dynamics of their so-far-platonic relationship. After all, who else to trust your heart other than your best friend? A story about life after war, growing up and learning to live after trying to stay alive all your life… and love. Mostly love and friendship. (8th year)
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: Nope, obviously not mine, they all belong to JK. (Harry and Hermione belong to each other though)**

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 **CHAPTER 1: Asking the Important Questions**

At the far end of the Hogwarts Library, near the Restricted Section, Harry Potter sighed as his emerald green eyes took in the scenery behind the large window. His favourite season had finally come, Hogwarts was once again covered in white. The dark green of the Forbidden Forest was now speckled with snow white, glinting silver with the afternoon sunshine that did nothing to warm the ground. The lake was also sparkling with orange sun rays, the setting sun mirroring on its frozen surface, creating the illusion of a lake on fire. Harry's eyes moved to the big oak tree at the shore of the lake. Its bare branches were also covered in snow, its trunk was standing wide and tall with its brown glory, looking like it came out of a cotton field. For some reason it was her favourite place to sit outside.

Her…

The girl- No, the young woman who occupied his thoughts since Friday afternoon…

Hermione…

She was once again sitting there, under the big oak tree when he found her.

 _ **~ Flashback ~**_

 _Harry slowly trudged through the snow towards the young woman sitting beneath the big oak tree. She had her knees drawn up to her chest and as Harry got closer, he realised with great surprise that there was no book that was keeping her occupied. Only her thoughts and the blue flames she loved so much to create._

" _You should teach me how to make those." She must have not seen him coming, for hearing his voice from so close startled her._

" _Oh, Harry! I didn't see you coming."_

" _I noticed. You seemed pretty deep in your thoughts." Harry said, smiling slightly as he sat down beside her. "You should teach me how to do this, too." He added, patting the snow underneath him which was magically heated but somehow wasn't melting. Hermione laughed lightly at his indirect praise._

" _I don't know, Harry. They're really advanced spells. Just because you defeated a dark lord doesn't mean you can do every spell you come across." she quipped. If it was someone else, they would think she was serious with her expressionless face and sober tone but Harry knew better. He knew her._

 _After they'd defeated Voldemort last summer for good, they took to making borderline offensive jokes about Voldemort and their victory. It was like their own little type of therapy. Making jokes was never their job in the famous trio before then; Harry was the hero, Hermione was the brains and Ron was the comic relief. However, they found out shortly after they started with these kind of remarks that this kind of humour was not for Ron's taste. Maybe it was because of his upbringing or maybe because, for some reason, he was affected more than them, Ron still flinched whenever someone, for the most part Harry or Hermione, said Voldemort's name or made an offhand joke about what they'd gone through. So with time, their banter started to become some kind of an inside joke, drawing the two of them closer than they'd ever been. And considering their close friendship before, it's safe to say that they were as close as two people could be in a platonic friendship._

 _Harry bumped his shoulder against hers lightly. "When will you learn that there is more to me than an ordinary hero? I'm smart, talented and powerful. Oh, and I'm extremely handsome but that doesn't have anything to do with my spellwork."_

" _And humble. Don't forget that." Hermione added with a hint of smile playing on her lips._

" _Oh yeah! I'm the humblest- most humble?" Harry stumbled in his answer, finishing it almost like a question._

" _The humblest." Hermione stage whispered, this time the smile was evident in her voice._

" _Yep! I'm the humblest person you could ever meet." Harry boasted with fake arrogance. Then, upon hearing Hermione's familiar genuine laugh, smiled heartily. "Nice to see that I can still make you laugh, even when you're deep in your melancholic mood."_

 _Hermione's laugh gave its place to a smile that still managed to make him feel warm inside. "That's what friends are for. To raise each other when they're down or, if they're too drained to stand up, to sit with them until they feel like they can get up and continue."_

" _So are we standing right now? Or are we sitting for a while?" Harry asked, using her metaphor to decipher her thoughts._

" _I think I should sit just a few more minutes. But it's nice to have company." Hermione answered, resting her chin on her drawn up knees._

" _Is it a silent kind of sitting or do you want to talk?" Harry asked this time. If this was before the war, he'd be freaking out right now, probably looking for a way out. But this was a common ritual for them now. Every once in a while, one of them would break down and the other would collect the pieces to mend. The result would be, more often than not, better than before. They believed, in time there would be no need for anymore mending. But to reach that period of their lives, they needed to talk every now and then._

" _We can talk." Hermione said, "I was just thinking how we've missed out on being a student at Hogwarts." She was gazing up at the aforementioned school with a wistful expression._

" _I don't think I understand." Harry knitted his eyebrows in confusion. "We are students. We even came back for an eighth year. Well, it's technically our seventh year but you know Voldemort and his lack of respect for our education." His last remark made Hermione snort which in turn made him grin with pride._

" _Yes, exactly. I know that he waited every year for the school year to end to execute his sinister plans but still we've missed out on so much because of him. Just think."_

" _Hmm…" Harry made a thinking sound to humour Hermione. "Like all the cancelled exams?"_

" _Oh yeah! I haven't even thought about them but that was disappointing as hell too, come to think of it." Hermione retorted to Harry's teasing question. "And all the things we could learn at DADA classes with a proper teacher."_

" _I missed out on my whole fourth year, trying to stay alive."_

" _We, Harry. You weren't alone. I don't think I slept that year." Then she snorted with frustration. "As if I've slept any other year. All my teenage years went by being worried for you."_

" _Sorry." This time it wasn't a joke and Hermione knew it. Her head snapped towards him._

" _Don't you dare to be sorry about something like this. You and I both know whose fault all these are. And I'm not complaining about worrying for you. I still worry for you because you're my friend and I love you." Harry was glad that she had turned her stare up to the blue flames and couldn't see the blush adorning his cheeks. It still amazed him how easy the words came to her when she was talking about her affection for him. "It was just so tiring to wonder if it was the last time I saw you every time you had to confront him. I know you think about it too, about how different your life would be if Voldemort didn't exist."_

" _I used to think about that more. You know… My parents, having a family, maybe having a sibling... But I guess at the end I came to accept my life as it is. I know you might not believe me but my life could be worse." Harry laughed at Hermione's disbelieving eyes. "Yeah yeah, I know what you're thinking but I'd like to think I've coped well with all the disadvantages Voldemort threw my way. He took my family but I managed to find myself a new one."_

 _Hermione smiled warmly at his words, her hand finding his and caressing it lightly. "Yeah, you did."_

" _He tried to kill me for how many times now? I've lost count. But it was me who killed him at the end."_

" _Yes, you did that too." She whispered proudly._

" _And considering that I grew up in a cupboard with the most loving relatives ever, I think I've turned out to be a pretty decent guy."_

" _Nah, I wouldn't go that far." Upon seeing the mock hurt look on Harry's face Hermione laughed. "Okay, okay! Honestly, you're the most decent guy I've ever known and I think you've set the bar quite high. You'll make a woman very happy one day." This time there was no escape from her eyes as he turned as red as Ron's hair. "And there goes one more thing we were deprived of!" Hermione exclaimed without commenting on his blushing face. Maybe interpreting it as a result of the cold air._

" _What?" Harry asked, in a way relieved for the distraction._

" _Dating."_

 _Harry gulped. "Dating?"_

" _Yes, dating. We couldn't do that properly either."_

 _Harry gulped again. "We? Dating?"_

" _I know you dated Cho and had a little incident with Ginny but they were all under Voldemort's shadow. And I didn't do even that." Hermione continued without hearing his panicked half-questions. "And don't say Krum. All we did was sit at the library and study."_

" _You'd said he watched you study."_

" _That doesn't make the situation any dating-like, Harry." Hermione commented. "If we had a normal school life, just imagine all the things you could do with the girl you fancy. The Hogsmeade trips, moonlit walks around the lake-"_

" _Occasional visits to the Astronomy Tower." Harry cut in with a saucy wink._

" _Studying together for the exams." Hermione continued with a dreamy look._

" _I thought you said that doesn't count as a dating activity."_

" _Depends on who you're doing it with." This time it was Hermione who winked cheekily._

 _Harry cleared his throat. "Flying." He offered quickly to change the subject._

" _Flying?" Hermione visibly shivered and Harry knew it had nothing to do with the cold winter air._

" _Yeah, it could be pretty romantic… With the right person…" Harry said with a low voice, almost a whisper._

" _If you say so." Hermione turned her gaze back towards the blue flames still flickering above them, careless of the slight wind blowing through them. "Too bad I've missed all these chances."_

 _If they weren't sitting shoulder to shoulder and Harry wasn't listening her every word, he would have missed the last part. "Why do you say that? We still have a whole semester. Plus two weeks before the winter break. Maybe you'll find someone."_

 _Hermione exhaled through her nose, making the sound come out as an incredulous laugh. "Who, Harry? I know every guy around me, and they know me. There isn't anyone like that. And most of them are intimidated by me. And you and Ron. You know, by the things we've accomplished, like fighting dark lords and killing basilisk etc."_

" _Yeah, that's a problem for me too. I can't seem to find a girl who sees the decent guy behind this great hero. They always fall for the Chosen One." This time it was Harry who couldn't keep up with the game and gave into his laughter. "I'm sorry. It's just really uncomfortable knowing that people really think those things."_

" _I know, Harry. They really think we are some sort of heroes. We just did what we have to do to survive. I can't even imagine what would happen if we failed." She trembled with fright. "And that's why I don't think I can find a man that can understand me and what we've been through. Every wizard knows me as Hermione Granger, the brainy best friend of the Great Harry Potter, The Chosen One, The Boy Who Lived, The Man Who Conquered. And if I find a muggle then I'll have to explain everything to him at the end. I don't think he'll understand the life we had, no matter how much I tell him. I can't seem to win in any way."_

 _Harry studied Hermione's profile without responding to her comments about her love life (or lack thereof). The wind had started to pick up, blowing through Hermione's chestnut curls, making them fall on her face. Harry drew the cold wind in his lungs, with it Hermione's familiar floral scent captured his senses, making him dizzy. His eyes followed the features he knew so well. Or he thought he knew them because now, looking at her- no, seeing her, really seeing her, with the wind in her hair, her cheeks flushed with cold, her chocolate brown eyes a little disappointed but nevertheless content with what she got…_

 _She was beautiful…_

 _The most beautiful woman he had ever seen and most probably will ever see. Because her beauty was both inside and outside. She was good hearted, loyal, intelligent, smart, funny, and she understood him…_

 _She was everything…_

 _Just as Harry opened his mouth to say something, anything, about his revelation, Hermione stood up._

" _Let's go, Harry. It's getting really cold and dark since the sun has set."_

 _And Harry just went along, dumbfounded by the thoughts still circling in his head._

 _ **~ End of Flashback ~**_

That was three days ago. It was now Monday evening and this conversation had been all he had thought about these last three days.

He thought about how she thought she'll be alone forever.

He thought about how impossible that was. Any guy would be lucky to have a woman like Hermione in his life.

And then he thought about how he didn't want "any guy" in Hermione's life. He simply couldn't stand the idea of it.

And this eventually led to the "what if…" kind of thoughts…

What if Harry asked Hermione out?

What if she said "No"?

What if she said "Yes"?

What if she said "Yes" and they became a couple and it didn't work out?

What if he lost her forever because of this?

What if he didn't say anything at all and Hermione found someone else and started dating him? Or worse married him?

What if she said "Yes" and they became a couple and they succeeded?

"Harry?" Harry's head snapped towards the source of the voice which was also the source of his endless thoughts.

There she was sitting across from him, studying from a dozen of books all heavier than her, looking all pretty and cute with her messy bun fastened with her wand, her sleeves rolled up to her elbows, and dried ink splotches on her hands and chin.

"Are you OK?" Her soft tone and concerned eyes made him spill what was already at the tip of his tongue for the last three days.

"Why aren't we together?"

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 **A/N: Hi! Just writing to say that this is my first long story with a plot in a long time and I don't think I'm really good at stories with plot. So, as you can guess, every review helps, whether it's about my style or just giving ideas (I love new ideas!) or just the occasional encouragement for me to stop procrastinating and write.**

 **Thanks for reading and reviewing (please) and hopefully we'll meet again in the next chapter! -xo**


	2. Chapter 2

" _Harry?" Harry's head snapped towards the source of the voice which was also the source of his endless thoughts._

 _There she was sitting across from him, studying from a dozen of books all heavier than her, looking all pretty and cute with her messy bun fastened with her wand, her sleeves rolled up to her elbows, and dried ink splotches on her hands and chin._

" _Are you OK?" Her soft tone and concerned eyes made him spill what was already at the tip of his tongue for the last three days._

" _Why aren't we together?"_

 **CHAPTER 2: Give Us a Shot**

"I'm sorry?" The words left her mouth almost like a breath. Apparently Harry had befuddled her with his unexpected (by both parties) question.

"Why aren't we together?" Harry replied, this time more consciously than the slip-up he just did.

"I heard you, Harry. I just didn't understand. We are together?" She had managed to make the last sentence come out as a fact and a question at the same time. Confusion was written all over her face.

"No, not like this. You know… Together together. Like- like a couple." Harry could feel his face burning, he was anxious and his words were coming out more awkward than they sounded in his head for the last three days. But he knew this was something he had to do. This was one of those moments in which you either did what your heart told you and dealt with the consequences later or let your brain take the lead and wonder about it for the rest of your life.

Harry didn't even think he had a brain at the moment.

"We- I- You… Togeth- Coup- Are you OK?" Hermione asked once again, this time a different type of concern evident in her voice.

"I think I should be the one asking that question." Harry laughed lightly. He had somehow managed to leave Hermione Granger speechless just with a question. "So?"

"So?" Hermione asked back, still puzzled. "Oh, you're really expecting an answer?" She'd done it again, asking questions while giving facts.

"Yes, please. This is all I've been thinking about for the last three days." Hearing his desperate tone must have done the trick, for Hermione put down her quill and closed the books surrounding her. A sure sign of her giving all her attention to him.

"Because we're friends. To be precise, we're best friends if I haven't misunderstood our relationship for the last eight years." She answered at last, a slight smile curving her lips upwards. She seemed amused at his question, after the initial shock passed that is.

"Yeah! We are best friends, why aren't we together?" Harry pressed, gaining courage from her smile.

Hermione sighed, "Because being best friends isn't enough for a relationship. We aren't that similar." She looked like she was searching for the right words to make him understand the obvious.

"Similar?" And he really wasn't understanding.

"Well, for example…" she stopped for a few seconds, trying to find some dissimilarities. "I like studying."

"Woah, Hermione! You're right, we can't be together. I didn't know this little information about you. This changes everything." He rolled his eyes, just in case his sarcastic tone wasn't enough to make her realise her example was ludicrous.

"Glad I could bring you to your senses." He loved it when she answered sarcasm with sarcasm.

"You brought me to my senses three days ago. It's my turn now." But now it was time to be direct. "I don't see why we can't be together. You know me better than anyone else. And I'd like to think I also know you quite well."

"I don't like Quidditch."

"What?" Harry was taken aback by the sudden change of topic.

"I don't like Quidditch. I told you we're not similar." Harry could tell she was holding back. There was something else she was thinking that she didn't want him to know.

"It's OK, I'm not asking you to be my team mate." He said, watching her expressions closely, trying to catch her off-guard to understand the real reason she was being so apprehensive about them.

"Well, I'm not fun to be with. You'll get bored with me when we're alone." He knew even she wasn't believing what she was saying.

"I spend more time with you alone than anyone else, even myself. And frankly I do think your company is quite enjoyable." He paused for a moment, squinting his eyes suspiciously. "Wait, why are we always talking about you? Is the problem me? Do you think I'm boring to hang out with?"

"No!" Hermione's quick answer made Harry grin with pleasure. "I like spending time with you."

"Exactly! We're happier together." His grin got wider when she blushed slightly.

"But you see me as a sister." Harry knew she was playing her last card. After this, he'd know the real reason of her doubts.

"I don't have a sister, Hermione, but I saw Ron and Ginny and I know what I feel for you is way different than their relationship." He said as calmly as he could. He wanted Hermione to believe that he was serious and he'd thought about this before talking to her. "But if you see me as a brother, then that changes everything." He finished, afraid of the answer.

"I don't see you as a brother. I don't know what having a brother is like but this feeling can't be it. It feels wrong to think of you as a brother." Harry smiled at her words. She was being honest with him, so there was hope. She wanted to be convinced that they could make it.

"Well, then?" he asked, his voice filled with anticipation. He knew there was a reason why she thought they can't be together, a real reason besides all these crap she put forward. And she was about to say it.

"Harry, just because you're having fun with someone or are good friends with someone, doesn't mean you should have a relationship with them. You need more than that." Her tone and slight blush made him apprehensive to ask the following question.

"What do you mean?" But he did it anyway. "What can I need more?"

Hermione sighed. He really wasn't making this easy for her. "You… I… I mean, there has to be a- a physical attraction." She wasn't looking him in the eyes and that wasn't a good thing.

"You don't find me attractive?" This time it was his turn to ask a question without really asking it. "But I thought you said I was more fanciable than ever. And that was like two years ago. I'd like to think I'm better looking now than I was at 16." He didn't know if he really wanted Hermione to say she wasn't attracted to him. No, he did know he didn't want Hermione to say such a thing but he didn't know if he was ready to hear her say that.

"I still think you're attractive, Harry." Harry's eyes, which were fixated on his hands resting on his lap, snapped to her face. She found him attractive, she thought he was handsome and sexy. Well… She may have not said it that way but he could definitely hear it in her voice. And he was sure he could see it in her eyes too, that is, if she looked at him. "But I'm not like the girls you fancy."

Oh, so that was the problem! Hermione thought she wasn't pretty enough to be his girlfriend.

That was the reason she was making him sweat with apprehension for the last ten minutes.

That was the reason she oh-so adamantly avoided telling him.

And that was complete and utter rubbish.

"I've only fancied two girls, Hermione. I think it's too early to say I have a type." The fact that she was still avoiding his eyes started to really annoy him. How could he know what she was thinking if she didn't even look at him?!

"But you do, Harry! You're into sporty, carefree and attractive girls." Her voice got so soft at the end, he wasn't sure if she said something more after 'girls.'

He sighed as he got up from his chair. He really couldn't stand not seeing her eyes while having this conversation. If it was a few year ago, he wouldn't mind this that much but now seeing Hermione's eyes was like hearing her thoughts. They had so much emotion swirling in their chocolatey depth and he'd learnt how to read them. He went around the big mahogany table to sit next to her.

"I'm not attracted to sporty girls. It was just a coincidence that both Cho and Ginny liked Quidditch. We had nearly nothing in common other than Quidditch and believe me when I say it gets boring to talk about a sport all the time. I have Ron for that. You know him, he starts talking about Quidditch when I say good morning and stops only when I fall asleep. Come to think of it, maybe he doesn't stop, I just don't hear him while sleeping." Harry was pleased to see her chuckle at his attempt at a joke.

"And I'm certainly not attracted to carefree girls. Easy-going? Yes. Fun to be around? Absolutely. Responsible while being all these things? Yes, please." He was making her lower her walls, he could see it in her small smile. If she just looked at him, he'd know for sure what to do to make her believe him.

"You're a sweet guy, Harry." She said, wringing her hands in her lap and watching them like they were the most interesting things in the world. To be honest, they were nice hands indeed but Harry needed her eyes.

"Won't you look at me?" The question left his mouth in a desperate tone. He was leaning towards her to catch a glimpse of her face, he _was_ desperate. "Please."

And there they were, looking tentatively at him. Now he was sure that she wanted- no, needed to be convinced. She was afraid. Of what, he wasn't sure for now. But he was going to find out.

"Thank you." He said, smiling warmly while looking into her eyes. "And you're definitely right about me being into attractive girls." Even he was surprised by his straightforwardness, so he could definitely understand her when her eyes opened slightly and her cheeks reddened.

"You think I'm pretty?" This was the most fact-like question she'd asked all afternoon, because it was practically a fact.

"I always knew you were pretty. Now I think you're more than pretty." He wanted to say beautiful but he was afraid of scaring her. When he saw her open her mouth, he knew she was going to object. She was Hermione, she never thought herself as an attractive woman. She thought she was more about intellectuality than beauty. And she was wrong.

"Thank you but we both know I'm nothing like Cho or Ginny." He could sense the disbelief in her 'thank you'.

"Cho and I are over, Hermione. Yes, she is pretty but that's it. Our relationship was a disaster. Not that we could call it a 'relationship' to begin with. And believe me when I say I really don't know how I've seen Ginny as something more than a sister. It's really disturbing to think of her as anything other than that." He was getting frustrated, he didn't think it would take more time to persuade Hermione than it took for him to build up the courage to come to terms with his feelings.

"What do you mean 'disturbing'? She asked, frowning slightly. His words had piqued her curiosity enough to make her forget about the main topic.

"I… I just noticed how similar she looks like my mother. It's just weird to… to think of her that way." Harry said. He loved Ginny, he really did but thinking of their brief relationship just made his stomach churn. He was really relieved that their friendship was unscathed after the break-up and they could have a sibling-like relationship with each other.

"Eww, Harry! I don't know if I can look at Ginny the same way after this." She was laughing again which meant she was getting comfortable with him again.

"Don't worry, if I can, you can too, 'Mione." He answered, laughing along with her. It was a good thing they always sat at the deep end of the library. Otherwise they'd be kicked out already. His emerald green eyes swept over her face. She was sitting towards him now, the table supporting their elbows while they were facing each other. "So?" He asked again.

His question made her sober up too. "So," She answered again but this time it wasn't a puzzled question. He knew her answer would follow soon. "You don't find me attractive, Harry."

Harry sighed, this wasn't the answer he was hoping for. "I thought we had reached an agreement that both of us found the other one attractive." He was far beyond the point of being shy now, he just wanted her to accept that they could have a relationship if they wanted, and of course, he wanted to have that relationship.

"What I mean is… It isn't enough to find someone attractive. There should be… I don't know…" She was trying to find the right words to express her thoughts, "Sparks."

"Sparks?" He was frustrating her, he knew it but he really wasn't understanding her point of view.

"Yeah, we may not be compatible." When he opened his mouth to object, she clarified, "In a physical way."

Maybe he wasn't that far beyond the point of being shy. He could feel his cheeks getting warm but he couldn't show any weakness now. They had passed the point of no return when they said they were attracted to each other and he wasn't about to give up just because she made him blush by implying possible intimacy. And to be honest, he was pleased to notice it was an excited type of blushing. He wasn't mortified by any means.

"Well, we can't really know that unless we try." He whispered, leaning towards her. His eyes caught on the ink smears on her chin and he smiled wickedly. Maybe some seducing was necessary to persuade her. He put a hand under her chin to lift her face towards his. All the while caressing her chin slowly, almost lazily, to wipe the smear. He could sense her slight shiver under his hand. "Who knows, maybe we will be so in harmony, there'll be fireworks, let alone sparks."

"Harry…" Hermione whispered. She had leaned back, making him drop his hand.

"Hermione… Come on… Give us a shot…" He whispered back. If he wasn't really sure of her feelings, he wouldn't insist but he had seen it in her eyes. And he had given up a lot of things already, he couldn't let Hermione pass him by too.

"I'm afraid." She was looking at him again. Trying to make him understand her with her eyes. And he did. He just thought he was in the right side this time. "I'm afraid of ruining our friendship."

"What if we promise to be friends, best friends, no matter what happens?" He asked. This was a fear of him too but he had a feeling that they would work out. He just couldn't imagine himself having a falling out with Hermione for any reason.

"Harry…" This was a different kind of 'Harry', softer, almost pleading.

"How about we try till the semester ends? Two weeks." He pleaded too. "And we can keep this between us if you want. This way no one can make a big deal if we fail."

"Don't say that." Hermione's eyes immediately found his.

Taking advantage of the situation, his hand found its way back to her chin. Holding her gaze, he leaned in again and whispered, "What?"

"Fail." She was whispering too. Considering they were in a library, this was the expected thing of them to do but the motivation behind their actions was way different than the usual. They were whispering because they were sitting so close they could almost hear each other's heartbeats. "Don't say 'if we fail', it won't be a failure. It'll just mean we're better off as friends."

Her choice of tenses made his heart speed up. Even if she was talking negatively, she was talking about the future… Their future…

"So does this mean you accept?" If he wasn't whispering, his voice would be shaking so badly.

"Ask me properly." There it was, that slight smile that had been missing for the last half an hour.

"Will you be my girlfriend?" He hadn't whispered this time but his voice wasn't that high to attract attention to them. Not that there were anyone else near where they were sitting anyways.

"For two weeks." Hermione stage whispered.

"For two weeks for now." Harry added on purpose.

"And we won't tell anyone. Not even Ron." Her smile was bigger now, Harry could tell she was getting excited about their new status just as much as he was.

"OK but we can't have the kind of relationship you said you wanted to have at Hogwarts if we don't act like a couple." And he surely wanted to act like a couple.

"Then we won't tell anyone but if they catch on, that's OK. Let them guess." Her grin would make the Cheshire Cat envy.

"Just say yes, 'Mione!" He would do anything she wanted at this point, just to hear that three lettered word. And it was just the beginning of their relationship, for Merlin's sake!

She laughed delightfully at his impatience, making his heart skip a beat. "Yes, alright! I'll be your girlfriend for two weeks."

"For now." He whispered as he leaned in for their first kiss.

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 **A/N: Thanks for all the reviews, they truly mean a lot! See you next chapter -xo**


	3. Chapter 3

" _Just say yes, 'Mione!" He would do anything she wanted at this point, just to hear that three lettered word. And it was just the beginning of their relationship, for Merlin's sake!_

 _She laughed delightfully at his impatience, making his heart skip a beat. "Yes, alright! I'll be your girlfriend for two weeks."_

" _For now." He whispered as he leaned in for their first kiss._

 **CHAPTER 3: Library Flirtings and Second Thoughts**

But his lips didn't meet hers as he expected, instead he felt two slim fingers holding him from leaning any further.

"Harry, what are you doing?" Hermione asked in a whisper, there was amusement in her tone.

"I was just going to check if we had any sparks." Harry said, his lips brushing against her fingers with every movement. She quickly pulled her hand away as if burnt. And of course her swift action didn't go unnoticed by him. He just didn't know if it was because she was affected by him in a good way or because she thought he was too close for comfort.

"Well, don't you think it's too soon? We have just started dating, what? Ten seconds ago? We haven't even held hands yet." The words were rushed and there was a small blush adorning her cheeks. She was flustered, so she must be affected by him in a good way.

Harry knew there were now two paths he could choose: 1) He could take a step back and give her some space to get used to their new status or 2) He could stand his ground and have a little fun with this flustered Hermione while he had the chance.

"We have been holding hands for 8 years." He loved flustered Hermione, so of course he chose the second path.

"You know what I mean." She rolled her eyes. Her lips had curled in a small smile, so he knew he was going the right way.

"Yeah, I know what you mean." He whispered, slowly sliding his chair closer to hers. "You want to be wooed."

"I don't want to be wooed!" She gasped. Harry smirked as he rested his elbow on the table in front of her, leaning in slightly.

"It's OK, I understand." He whispered, propping his head with his hand.

"Harry, I don't want you to do such a thing!" She whispered back fiercely. A blush was taking over her face.

"Mmm hmm…" Harry's smirk got bigger. He always loved teasing Hermione and he was enjoying himself more than ever with this new territory Hermione had just granted him by accepting his proposal.

"You know very well I don't expect such a thing from you!" She was still trying to convince him. It was really intriguing for him to see her so flustered over just a little teasing from him.

"From me? So you expect this from someone else, huh?" He frowned in mock-hurt.

"Of course no- You're toying with me." She understood at last. She had squinted her eyes, giving him her you-are-in-trouble glare.

"And I'm enjoying every second of it." But he was in a daring mood, so he didn't take a step back. "I'd love to be wooed, by the way… By you."

"Harry James Potter if you keep this up, I swear I'll hex you so bad, you'll miss Voldemort's curses!" She hissed. Harry grinned upon hearing her words. He knew he was close to the border now. If he didn't take his next step carefully, Hermione would be mad at him for real but if he said the right thing, she would soften and maybe even return his teasing.

"Aww, 'Mione, you know I prefer you over old Lord Voldemort any time of the day." He pouted, his free hand slowly making its way to hers.

"Are you sure? If I remember correctly, you were really determined to go to him and leave me behind." She retorted. Voldemort jokes were back which meant Hermione was back on track.

Harry let his fingers lightly caress her hand which was resting on her lap, urging her to react to his touch. She turned her hand so his fingers were now grazing her palm, tickling her slightly.

"No need to be jealous, he's gone now. I'm all yours." He thought he was being really smooth… until Hermione snorted... "Hey!"

"Oh, Harry! I think you're the only person who can use a pick-up line about Voldemort and get away with it." She was still laughing and had removed her hand from under his to wipe her eyes.

"Hey!" Harry said again, leaning back on his chair and moving away from her in the process. "I'm trying to be romantic here."

Hermione sobered upon seeing his little pout but there were still traces of her laughter in the form of a smile.

"OK, I'm sorry. I'm just not used to seeing you like this." She said softy. She was playing with her quill. Harry's eyes followed the feather twirling between her delicate fingers and felt an itch to reach over and took her hand between his again.

What the hell was happening to him? She was Hermione for Merlin's sake!

OK, he was not denying that he was attracted to her but he had never felt this way for her before.

Hell! He had never felt this way for anyone before!

So of course it would be for Hermione…

Who else could he be this comfortable with?

It was always meant to be Hermione…

"Harry?" Hermione's concerned voice broke through his thoughts.

"Huh?" Harry asked automatically.

"You zoned out for a minute there." There was a little amusement in her voice too. "Thinking about the good old days with Voldy, huh?"

"I can perfectly turn this around but I won't." He humphed.

"Aww, are you cross with me?" Now she was the one resting her elbow on the table and leaning towards him.

"No." Harry said curtly.

"Is that why you are pouting like a little boy?" She had propped her temple on her palm, an amused smile was playing on her lips.

"I'm not pouting!" Harry pouted.

"Yes, you are." She laughed. "And you are damn cute with it." Harry perked up upon hearing her last words.

 _She called him cute!_

"Cute, huh? What else?" He decided to try his luck.

Hermione's laugh was an enough indicator for him that he was doing something right.

"Definitely playful." She responded.

"And?" Now he was pushing his luck but his instincts were saying to go till the end. This was Hermione, after all. If he wasn't going to act on his instincts when it came to her, when else would he?

"Extremely cheeky." Harry had never thought flirting with Hermione would be this fun. The fact that she knew him so well made him relax and say the things that were actually on his mind without restricting himself.

"And?" He asked again suggestively, slightly leaning forward towards her.

"Utterly incorrigible." She retorted at once. She hadn't leaned back when he got closer which was a very good sign for Harry to carry on with their banter.

"Encourageable?" He didn't know if it was his question or his hopeful tone that made her laugh but he certainly wasn't complaining.

"That's not a word." She whispered.

"Too bad. I really thought you were encouraging me for a second there." He winked.

Hermione didn't say anything in return, her laugh slowly leaving its place to a soft smile. The silence was making Harry nervous but he didn't dare to break it. She was staring deep into his eyes. Harry knew this look, she was trying to find an answer.

"What are you thinking?" He asked at last. He wasn't used to not being able to read her thoughts.

"I didn't know you were like this with girls." She said, finally breaking her stare to look over his shoulder. But Harry decided he liked it better when she looked at him. Her averting her eyes meant she was uncomfortable with the topic and it was a situation he'd like to avoid.

"Like what?" He asked, leaning even more so she had no other choice but to look at him.

"Comfortable… Playful… I don't know…" She paused, her chocolate brown eyes were back at doing their thing, penetrating his soul to get answers. "I didn't know you were such a flirt."

"Believe me, I didn't know it either." He answered truthfully. "I guess it's because it's you, you are bringing out new sides of me."

"So you weren't like this with Ginny and Cho?"

Harry thought he could hear a pinch of jealousy in her voice but it could totally be his imagination too.

"Aww, are we jealous now?" He asked, deliberately keeping her gaze to gauge her reaction.

"I-I-I…" She stammered, she wasn't expecting his question. But seeing his cheeky grin must have made her relax, for she raised an eyebrow before asking, "I don't know, should I be?"

"I don't know. Are you a jealous girlfriend?" He shot back daringly.

"I don't know, guess we'll find out together." She responded without breaking eye contact. Harry didn't say anything after that. This time the silence was a pleasant one. They were just enjoying each other's company.

Hermione was still leaning on the table, her head resting on her palm while she was playing with her quill with her other hand. Harry's eyes got caught on the quill again and this time he decided to scratch the itch. He reached for her hand, replacing the feather quill with his fingers.

He had held Hermione's hand thousands of times before, in reassurance, in fear, in sympathy, while running from some sort of trouble or walking away from his parents graves… But this time was different. For one thing, he wasn't the one who initiated most of them before, but mostly because this time there wasn't any motive other than to hold her hand, to touch her, to feel her skin beneath his in the most innocent way possible.

"Let's go outside." He whispered at last, breaking the silence.

"I can't, Harry. I have to study." Hermione whispered back apologetically. "We've been talking for nearly an hour now, I'm already behind." She had gone back to her sitting position as if she had returned to the reality by Harry's unintentional reminder.

"But 'Mione, we've been studying for the last three hours." Harry pouted. At least she hadn't removed her hand from his.

"Don't use that face on me just because I said you look cute, Potter." She said as seriously as she could.

"And don't try to soften me by calling me cute, Granger." Harry retorted. "Let's go outside and walk around a little till dinner. We can study after dinner."

"I really have to study. You know I have an important exam in two days." He knew, Hermione was stressing over her Arithmancy exam for over a week now.

"Yeah, I know." He sighed, slightly squeezing her hand before releasing it and giving her her quill back.

"What? Are you regretting this already?" Hermione asked as she was opening the books she had closed to talk with him. "This is what it's like to date me, Potter. You can back out if you want."

Although she was joking, Harry knew this was something Hermione often thought about. She believed people thought she was boring because of her organised life and tight study schedule. And even though, every now and then, her studying habits restricted his wants and desires, he really admired her ambition and dedication.

"I'm just disappointed that we can't study together. I don't know anything about Arithmancy." Harry joked back.

"Aww, it's OK. We can study Transfiguration after my Arithmancy exam. In fact, you should start studying now. So you won't cram on Wednesday."

Oh, right… As the semester break was in two weeks, they were officially in their exam week. Hence the reason they were in the library for half of the day. Since Hermione took more courses than him, she had more exams too.

"But you'll help me later, right? After you've studied, that is." Harry asked hopefully. The year-long break they had to take because of the Horcrux hunt had made going back to school harder for him. He felt like he had forgotten what it was like to be a student.

"Of course. We'll revise everything but you have to study first." Hermione pointed at his books, motioning for him to go back to his place at the other side of the table.

"So can we say it's a date?" Harry asked as he went back to his previous seat right across from her, the view was surely better there anyways.

Hermione laughed lightly at his question, "Yes, we can call it a date. I mean, what else would I want in a date other than studying Transfiguration with an attractive guy in the library?"

"Attractive, huh?" Harry repeated saucily.

"Harry…" was all she said before going back to her studies but he could see the smile she tried to hide behind her books. Harry sighed and opened his book too. Hermione was right, he had to study, otherwise he'd be in trouble.

He leaned back on his chair and rested the book against the table's edge. As his eyes scanned over the lines and the chart of wand movements required for the charm, he could hear Hermione's quill scratching away on a piece of parchment. He couldn't help but look up at her.

Even without the temptation of watching her, he was having trouble concentrating but now, knowing she was reciprocating his feelings, knowing he would be spending his time near her without trying to repress his feelings towards her, knowing he was allowed to touch her as more than a friend, he couldn't help but feel excited for the future. And this was the thought that amazed him the most: After nearly eight years of fighting evil and trying to stay alive, and even counting the childhood he never had, he could finally look to the future and be excited about it. He had fought all his life to have a future and now he had it. And above it all, he had the chance to have it with the young woman sitting before him.

He couldn't mess this up.

Harry let his eyes roam over Hermione's face, or at least what he could see of it. Her hair was up in a messy bun, held in place by her wand. He couldn't get his head around how girls could do things like that. But he liked it. He liked it when she had her hair down too but when she had it up, he could see her long neck better. His hand itched to touch her right where her neck met her jaw, just beneath her ear. Her skin looked so soft, he bet it would feel just as soft under his fingers… or lips…

"McGonagall won't ask about my face." Harry jerked back into reality with Hermione's words. Her tone was serious but he could see the smile she was trying to hold back.

"Now that would be one exam I could study for day and night." Harry replied, leaning forward and resting his chin on his palm. Hermione raised one eyebrow and mimicked his movement by resting her chin on her palm.

"So you are saying after 8 years, you still don't know my face by heart." She was still holding back that smile he so wanted to see.

"No, I'm saying I'll never get tired of looking at that face but I would like to study it a little closer if you don't mind."

And there it was, that shy but pleased smile. She averted her eyes from his after a few seconds of intense gazing and started gathering her books.

"Let's go to dinner, suddenly I'm starving." She said quickly.

"Yeah, me too." Harry whispered as he packed his stuff. Fortunately, or unfortunately, Hermione didn't hear him.

* * *

In a few seconds, they were walking out of the library to go to the Great Hall for dinner. Hermione had her heavy looking book bag in one hand and another book in the other hand, holding it close to her. Harry looked at her full hands and sighed. He had hoped to hold her hand as they walked side by side.

He adjusted his backpack on his shoulder and reached towards her bag.

"Let me carry this for you."

But Hermione didn't let go.

"No, it's OK. I can carry my own stuff."

Harry sighed. Hermione and her I-am-a-strong-independent-woman-who-don't-need-no-man side.

"I know you can do it but I want to carry it." He said and went to take it from her hand.

And again she didn't let go.

"It isn't heavy, Harry. I charmed it."

Ah, of course she had charmed it! How else would she carry the entire library with her all day?

"I want to carry it because it's getting in the way, 'Mione."

"Getting in the way of what?" She asked but this time she let him take the bag, probably out of curiosity. It was indeed very light, almost non-existent in his hand. He passed the bag to his left hand and held out his right to her.

"This." He just said in answer. Hermione looked down at his hand and then at his face and then looked down again before she placed her hand in his. This may be the hundredth time they held hands but this was the first time she blushed like that upon doing it.

Harry closed his hand around hers and begin walking again.

"You were right. Holding hands is an important step. I'm glad we didn't skip it." He said without turning his head towards her but he could see the shy smile adorning her lips. And he knew if she had a free hand, he would be punched in the arm.

"You are surely talking too much tonight, aren't you?" She bumped her shoulder against his instead.

"I'm compensating for you." He mimicked her action. "You're uncharacteristically quiet."

Hermione looked down at their intertwined hands.

"I'm trying to get used to it." She whispered.

Harry turned his gaze to her but didn't say anything. He had thought she was shy about their new status but her actions were starting to make him anxious. He couldn't be sure if she was just nervous -in an excited way- or if she was having second thoughts. But before he could gather his courage to ask, they were in front of the big oak doors of the Great Hall.

And he felt Hermione remove her hand from his.

Instinctively he looked towards her and when he saw the apologetic smile on her face, he felt a little better. It was still new for them and he could understand why she may want to keep this between them for a while.

They went and sat across from Ron at their usual place. As he had left them when they were just thirty minutes in in their studying, he threw a guilty look towards them.

"How are you mate? Do you still have your will to live after studying all afternoon?" Before Harry could answer, Ron winced, "Ouch, Hermione! Why did you do that for?" As he bent down to rub the spot Hermione had just kicked him at, Harry reached to his left and took the roasted potato plate.

"Actually I'm great Ron. I can easily say it was the best study session ever." As he put some potatoes on Hermione's plate, he saw her trying to hide her smile behind the jug of pumpkin juice. She poured some for Harry and put the glass in front of him. The kick must be enough warning for Ron because he didn't choose to say anything after that. Harry and Hermione filled each other's plates like they always did and began eating in silence.

The three of them were enjoying their meal with the occasional talk and pass of plates when Harry decided to try his chance again.

"So, how about a walk around the lake after dinner?" he asked in his lowest voice possible without downright whispering.

"I'm down for it." Apparently it wasn't low enough as Ron answered him across from the table. Harry, doing his hardest to hide his disappointment, threw a smile at his best mate before turning his eyes at the real subject of his question: His other best friend and new girlfriend.

"You, 'Mione? Are you down for it too?" No matter how hard he'd try, he was sure Hermione would be able to detect the frustration and disappointment in his voice.

"Yeah, OK." She said matter-of-factly, like she didn't know for how long and how much he had been asking this, like she didn't know why he wanted this, like the last couple of hours were just a figment of his imagination and she wasn't aware of his affections towards her.

Harry let out a deep sigh before gulping down his pumpkin juice. As if Hermione's indifference wasn't enough, now he had Ron to entertain instead of making sure Hermione wasn't having second thoughts about them.

And then he felt it, her warm hand sliding into his under the table, her first attempt at a contact after being a couple.

And all of his frustration went out of the window in an instant.

She slightly squeezed his hand before letting him go to refill his glass of pumpkin juice.

"Thank you."

His words were more for her reassurance than the pumpkin juice and she knew it. He knew that she knew it. It was in the way she smiled at him, it was in the way she looked in his eyes for that millisecond before going back to her plate, it was in the way she rested her knee against his.

But he had to ask her nonetheless… He had to make sure she was a hundred percent okay with them… And to do this, he had to have her alone… In other words, he had to find a way to get rid of Ron…

* * *

 **A/N: 1) I'm not very pleased with this chapter but I don't think it'll get any better than this. I've been re-reading this chapter for the last week and I couldn't change anything. I just hope you liked it.**

 **2) This is the longest fanfiction (with a plot) I've ever written and it isn't even halfway done yet. It's just hard for me to write continuous chapters, so please don't mind the inconsistencies and if you see one that is crucial, please let me know.**

 **3) "Incorrigible/Encourageable" exchange is from a fanfiction I adore:** _ **Bewitched, Bothered and Bewildered**_ **by cheering charm (If you want the link, just write in the reviews or DM me). I just wanted to include it as a tribute and I may use it again in the later chapters.**

 **4) Lastly and most importantly, thank you for the positive feedback, I really appreciate it -xo**


	4. Chapter 4

_But he had to ask her nonetheless… He had to make sure she was a hundred percent okay with them… And to do this, he had to have her alone… In other words, he had to find a way to get rid of Ron…_

 **CHAPTER 4: Moonlit Confessions and Much-Anticipated Sparks**

Harry sighed for the umpteenth time. He was cold to his bones, he was frustrated and he was getting more and more desperate with every passing second. For some reason his plans weren't working. Whatever he did, he couldn't make Ron change his mind and Hermione's amused smile didn't help the matters.

So there they were, the three of them walking around the frozen lake in the moonlight. There was a slight breeze but not enough to make them want to go back inside. The dark silhouette of the forest was to their left, the frozen lake with the reflection of the full moon on its surface to their right. It was kind of romantic to be honest.

If only they were alone…

He inhaled deeply, the sharp air filled his lungs. As he let the air out slowly, he watched the vapour leave his mouth. This was what he was doing for the last ten minutes. Watching his breath leave his mouth and listen to Hermione.

Oh, yeah!

She had been talking non-stop for the last ten minutes. If he didn't know what she was talking about, he would think it was the most fascinating topic in the world. But no, she was talking about the 4 feet long essay she wrote for her Arithmancy class _("Professor Vector only wanted 2 feet but I could only shorten it to 4 feet"_ ) and what really frustrated him was that she really wasn't bothered that Ron was there with them, ruining their plan (well, his plan to be honest) to be alone.

He knew he was being too harsh on Ron. In the end, the poor guy didn't even know he wanted to be alone with his new girlfriend. Hell! He didn't even know Hermione was his girlfriend. Not that Hermione herself seemed to be aware of that little fact. It was like the last few hours hadn't even happened.

Harry shuffled his feet in the snow as he listened to Hermione's voice ringing in the cold evening air.

"But I'm so glad I finished my Transfigurations essay on Saturday. You know, with the Arithmancy exam coming up, it would really-"

"Wait! What Transfigurations essay?"

Ron's panicked voice made Harry come out of his trance. He turned to his left where Ron was looking at him over Hermione's head between them. It looked like he had just come out of a trance of his own.

"Did we have homework?" He asked alarmed. Harry furrowed his brows. He didn't know such a thing. They had an exam in two days and McGonagall wasn't the type of teacher to give end of the semester homework.

"I don-" Harry started but felt all the air leave his lungs with Hermione's elbow subtly hitting him.

"Yeah, didn't you know?" She asked, turning to Harry and winking at him. "I think Harry did it today at the library."

"Oh, shit!" Ron cursed, "What is it about?"

"Umm…" Harry didn't know what was going on, he certainly did not write any essay today.

"A brief summary of the semester." Hermione said in a heartbeat, not letting him talk. "We'll hand it before the exam."

"Oh, no…" Ron whined, "Why didn't I know of this?"

"You were sleeping for the most of the class." Hermione's cold-hearted tone made Harry shiver more than the air.

"Yeah, you're right… I guess…" Ron muttered. "I better go and start then." He sighed. "See you later." He turned and started walking (almost running) back to the castle.

"So… You wanted to be alone right?" Hermione asked, turning towards him when Ron was away from the earshot.

Harry looked at Hermione then at his friend's retreating back and then back at Hermione. She was grinning mischievously. And then it dawned on him.

"There is no homework."

Hermione's laugh was enough answer for his bewildered statement.

"Hermione, you are a wicked witch. You're incredible." He said looking at the already small silhouette of his friend. "Poor Ron. He will be so mad when he realises there is no homework."

"It's for his own sake." Hermione replied, still grinning. She took his arm and began walking, making him walk beside her in the process. "He would never study until the last day and then he would beg me to tutor him and he would tag along to our _study date_."

Harry couldn't help but smile upon hearing her say those two words.

 _Study date…_

So she was very well aware that they had a thing going on. He wasn't just going crazy imagining things. And she wasn't having second thoughts, she was just acting like that because she didn't want other people to know about them.

But didn't that mean she was unsure of _them_?

"So? What did you have in mind when you asked me out here?" She asked tugging at his arm and pulling him out of his thoughts.

"Nothing actually." He lied. But as soon as the words left his mouth, he regretted.

"Oh, you mean you brought me out here to freeze to death?" She laughed, she knew he was hiding something. He knew her enough to know that she was waiting for him to open up.

"I…" He began, "Hermione, I know I asked you out but…" He didn't know how to ask if she was having second thoughts without giving her second thoughts if she wasn't having any.

 _Sounds complicated, right?_

"Are you having second thoughts?" She asked, making him choke on his own breath. "Do you want to cancel our agreement?"

"I- What?! NO!" Harry nearly shouted around his coughing. "I mean, no, of course not! And don't call it an agreement, I'm serious about giving us a try. You make it sound like it's a… a… I don't know the word for that." Harry frowned.

"An arranged relationship between two people who can't seem to find someone to love themselves for who they are so they are giving their best friend a shot?" If it wasn't for the playful glint in her eyes, Hermione's serious tone would have made Harry really nervous with this exceptionally clinical description of what they were really doing.

"Yeah… But it's not just that, right?" Harry asked. He really wished he could be as playful as Hermione right now but he was really anxious about her real thoughts. Sure, they had nice moments in the library ( _Nice? More like heated with sexual tension like he had never felt before_ )but he still wanted to be sure. He had to ask her one last time if she was really OK with dating him or was she doing it because he wanted her to.

"Harry…" She sighed and stopped walking to turn towards him. She pulled her arm away from his and hugged herself. "What is it? Just tell me."

Harry inhaled the cold air, feeling it fill his lungs.

"Hermione, look… I… I just want to be sure that you really want this." He put his finger against her lips as she opened them to speak. They were cold, unlike earlier in the library. "No, let me finish." He said and pulled his hand away when he saw her small nod. "I'm… not a romantic bloke and I… I most certainly don't understand these relationship things."

He stopped to give a little chuckle. He was staring down at his boots buried in the snow, he couldn't look at her, afraid of seeing sympathy in her chocolatey depths. He didn't want her sympathy, he wanted her to really give them a shot because she believed that there could be something great between them, not because she felt sorry for him.

"I… I feel like I'm changing as a person… since defeating Voldemort. I can see a future for me now. I'm… not afraid of imagining it. And I'm… I'm really comfortable with you, you know? I wouldn't be saying these things if it was any other woman beside me now." He paused. He had to see her eyes. Yes, he was afraid but he was a Gryffindor, wasn't he?

He slowly looked up, she was staring at him. But there wasn't sympathy in her eyes. No, there was something else. He couldn't really put his finger on it but he most certainly liked what he saw.

"I trust you," he continued, never breaking the stare, "I respect you, I love you as a friend. And I'm almost certain you feel the same way about me."

"Oh, Harry… This is the first time you said you loved me." Hermione whispered shakily. He could see that her eyes had gotten teary.

"You know me, I'm not a vocal person when it comes to feelings." He muttered uncomfortably. He was pushing his limits. Yeah, he may have been more open and relaxed back in the library but for some reason this was different. This conversation felt more serious, the atmosphere was more… tangible. He couldn't hide behind his jokes and teasing this time.

"But I should have told you this before. You are one of my best friends. You were there with me, beside me, every step of the way. I'd die without you and your friendship. And I love you… as a friend… and possibl-"

"Oh, Harry!" Hermione cut his monologue with her catchphrase and jumped on him, hugging him so tightly and tackling him backwards in the process.

Harry felt the coldness of the snow and the warmth of the girl upon him at the same time but the kiss Hermione planted on his cheek was what made his insides warm up. This may not be the first kiss Hermione gave him but this was most certainly the best kiss anyone had ever given him. And it was ridiculously chaste, in fact it was so chaste and simple, it made him crave for more.

"Oh, Harry, I love you, too." He knew that she meant it _as a friend_ , she didn't need to add that but that didn't deter him from imagining the day that she would say that _as something more_.

"Umm…" For a moment Harry didn't know what to say, it was possible that he didn't even know how to form a sentence. Hermione's solid weight on him was very distracting. He cleared his throat, "Ahem… If I knew you were waiting for me to say this, I'd have said it sooner. I thought you knew that I love you… and Ron." he added as an afterthought.

Since Hermione's face was hidden in the crook of his neck, he couldn't see her face but he could definitely feel her breath. Her warm breath was moistening his neck, tickling his insides and when she lifted her head to talk, Harry felt the already cold air freezing his warmed skin.

"To be honest, I had a sneaking suspicion about that." Upon seeing his frown she laughed, "Just kidding, of course I knew." She added as she rolled off of him to the side, "It just feels good to hear it sometimes."

Harry closed his eyes at the loss. It was ridiculous to feel this way about something as simple as not having her on top of him anymore.

Woah! That came out way more sexual than he had intended. _Those are dangerous waters, Potter!_

"Harry?" Hermione's voice shook him from his –slightlyinappropriate- thoughts. She had lain down beside him and, to Harry's delight, her head was resting on his shoulder.

"'Mione?" he asked back with the same tone she used.

"What are you thinking?" Harry felt himself redden at her question. Thanking the gods above for the cold air to blame his flushed cheeks, he cleared his throat,

"Ahem… Nothing in particular…" She didn't say anything in return, allowing an uncomfortable silence to fall over them. The stillness of the night almost making Harry regret not saying what he was actually thinking of.

After a few minutes that actually felt like hours to Harry, Hermione's soft voice broke the silence.

"I'm sure."

"What?" Harry was so busy trying not to think of her head on his shoulder, he couldn't understand what she meant by that. Did he miss something?

"You asked me if I really wanted this and I'm answering you: Yes, I want to try this. I'm sure." Harry turned his head to look down at her, she was looking at the night sky. Harry could only see a part of her face from this angle.

"Are you sure?" His question made her laugh slightly and turn her face towards him.

"Did you just ask me if I'm sure of being sure?" She asked, her eyes were twinkling like the stars above them.

"Umm, I guess I did." He grinned sheepishly. "One can never be so sure, you know." Hermione's laugh turned into a content smile as she put her head back on his shoulder.

"Well, you don't have to worry about this, Harry James Potter. If I wasn't sure before, I am now." She snuggled into his shoulder as if trying to get comfortable with her pillow. "So far you are doing a good job at assuring me."

Harry was at a loss for words. He was snuggling with Hermione, his best friend, in the middle of the night, on the snow and he was enjoying it. Actually he was enjoying it so much, he never wanted to go back. His robes were certainly thick enough to keep him warm and there was Hermione's warmth too. _But what if she was cold?_

"Maybe you should cast that spell you did last time." He said after a long, or maybe short, silence. "To make the snow warm. I wouldn't want you to be cold because of me."

"Nah, then I'd be too comfortable to move." She answered. Harry could see her slight smile.

"I think you're already comfortable." Harry grinned, turning his face towards the star filled sky but keeping his stare on her from the corner of his eye. If the cold wasn't deceiving him, Hermione was blushing. She made to move away from him but he extended his arm, which was lying on his stomach up until that point, and put it around her shoulders, making her lie on his chest. "I didn't say I wasn't comfortable."

Yep, she was definitely blushing.

Hermione once again got comfortable on his chest, her left hand found his right one which was wrapped around her shoulder.

"This may be the first time you ever initiated a hug with me." She said in a low voice, as if she was afraid of making him realise what he was doing. Little did she know he was very aware of what he was doing. "Actually, earlier in the library, I guess it was the first time you ever touched me. Of course, aside from all the times we had to touch, it was the first time you touched me without any reason." Her eyes were fixed on the stars above, it was almost like she was talking to herself.

"I'm not- I mean… It's not-" Harry didn't know how to put his thoughts into sentences. He knew what he wanted to say but thoughts were just thoughts, they were refusing to be defined by words.

"I know." Hermione said, lightly squeezing his hand. "You are not a tactile person. You don't really like to touch people or be touched by them."

"It's just… I didn't grow up that way. I'm not used to it." He whispered. After all these years and he could still be amazed at the way she knew him.

"I know that too." She whispered back as if she heard his thoughts, he could hear her slight smile.

"Yeah, you know me." He sighed into the cold air. "Sometimes it can be scary how well you know me. Almost like you're in my head."

"Aww, don't be scared. I'm not a pervert like Voldemort. I don't go around snooping in your mind." she teased, "I just like to know things. And frankly, I love knowing things about my favourite things."

Harry felt his heart almost skip a beat upon hearing her words. _Her favourite things…_

"To be honest, I wouldn't mind having you in my mind instead of an old man. My teenage dreams would be far better with you in them, for sure." His teasing words earned him a gasp and a smack on the chest from Hermione.

"You are getting cheekier and cheekier, Potter."

"Then, I guess I'm lucky that I'm your favourite thing, huh?" he replied. Flirting with Hermione was rapidly becoming one his hobbies. She was good at comebacks, maybe it was a result of her bickering with Ron but theirs were not bickering, theirs were banters, more playful, more teasing.

"Well, for the record, I didn't say you are my favourite thing." She retorted.

"You implied it." He shrugged, making her head lightly bop on his shoulder.

"I may have. But I didn't say it." Her sing-song voice made him chuckle.

"I like this." He said simply, he was not entirely sure of what he was referring to. He just liked it.

"Yeah, me too." She answered. She had understood him once again.

"The stars are beautiful tonight."

"Mmm-hmm. The moon, too." Harry's eyes moved towards the full moon, it was very bright, almost too bright.

"I guess you can check off 'moonlit walks around the lake' on your to-do list." He said referring to the conversation they had last Friday that started all of this.

"We could say that…" She answered, her eyes focused on the full moon. "But I'd like to do it without Ron tagging along… and in warmer weather." Harry restrained himself from turning towards her after her last remark but he saw her wince slightly out of the corner of his eye. If he wasn't watching for her reaction, he would have missed it. She cleared her throat and elaborated, "Not that it's certain that we'll be together by then… but still…" Her voice trailed off towards the end.

Although he very much wanted to answer her doubtful remark, he decided to ignore it for the moment.

"It's my turn now. We should fly." He said instead, bumping her shoulder with his hand wrapped around her. Upon seeing her terrified look, he added, "Not now, I'll arrange something soon."

"Harry, it's cold." Hermione tried to object. Harry knew her enough to know that cold was the least of her worries when it came to flying.

"I know a spell to keep warm while flying. How do you think we play Quidditch without freezing our arses off?" He smirked when he saw her pout. "But we can fly in warmer weather, too. The afternoons in the spring are marvellous for flying. Quite romantic." he fished for a reaction.

"Well… I guess we should agree to disagree on this one. You know that I don't like flying."

"No, I think what you don't like is heights." He answered confidently.

"Harry, flying may not be one of my strongest suits but I know that it's done up in the air." Even though Harry couldn't see her face, he was sure that Hermione had just rolled her eyes at him.

"Yes but I'll be there to keep you safe. Just like I did when we flew on Buckbeak." Harry tried, he really wanted to convince her that it was a good idea.

"For your information, I didn't like that." Hermione stated.

"Yeah, I can still hear your screams in my head." Hermione once again smacked his chest.

"Don't be a jerk." Her laugh made it sound like an endearment. "But really Harry, I'm not good with flying. Maybe it's for the best if we establish this from the beginning." She stopped for a few seconds but Harry didn't cut in, he knew she was trying to gather her thoughts. "I don't like heights… I'm not good at flying… I can never be your dream girl. No, let me finish," she stopped him when he opened his mouth to object. "I'm not saying you won't be happy with me, I'm just saying I can't be that 'right person' you want to go on romantic afternoon flights with."

"I think riding a hippogriff in the middle of the night is the most romantic thing I've ever done." Harry replied, "If we ignore the fact that we were racing against time to save Sirius... and of course your screams." This time it was him who rushed to stop her before she could cut in, "And we talked about this earlier, I don't want a sporty girl, I don't care if you can't fly. I'm not thirteen anymore, my expectations from a relationship is more than common hobbies."

His last words were the beginning of a long silence. He didn't have anything else to say, he felt like after this point, pushing Hermione to fly with him wouldn't be right. He had said his opinion on the subject, the ball was now in her court.

Hermione was staring at the sky, the concentration on her face looked like she was trying to read the stars to know what to say. After a few minutes of silence, filled with animal sounds coming from the Forbidden Forest, she whispered out of nowhere,

"In ancient times, the hippogriff was the symbol of love." Her words made him smile, so this was what she had been thinking for the last few minutes: Love.

"No wonder it felt romantic then."

"According to some sources, the hippogriff is the symbol of impossible love."

Harry's smile fell for a split second but he recovered quickly. "Well, I can't see anything impossible about us. I think we passed that 'impossible' stage when we battled magical creatures, destroyed cursed objects and defeated a dark lord." He turned his head to kiss her temple but changed his mind at the last moment, he pressed his nose to her head lying on his chest and whispered, "Now is the time to concentrate on the 'love' part of our relationship, both as friends and hopefully more."

"I guess you're right." She smiled into his chest.

"Of course I am. I'm Harry Potter." Harry replied with fake-confidence.

"Oh, I'm sorry. How could I've doubted the Chosen One?" She mocked him with a grin.

"It's OK, just don't let it happen again."

They'd been lying on the snow for nearly twenty minutes now and even though it was chilly, Harry didn't want to go inside just yet. He just hoped Hermione wasn't cold. He wanted to ask but he didn't want her to think he wanted to go inside. In the end, he decided to tighten his arm around her in hopes of warming her –and just because he liked holding her close.

"This is weird." He heard himself murmur.

"What is it?" Hermione asked raising her head to look at his face. Harry hadn't intended to say this out loud but since he had, he decided to continue.

"We've hugged countless times before but none of them felt this way." His unsure whisper was barely heard but her closeness helped her to catch every word.

"I don't think we really hugged before. I mean I hugged you, you just put your arms around me in return." Harry wanted to object but he couldn't remember initiating a hug with her or with anyone else for that matter. Like Hermione had said he just wasn't that kind of a person. "Have you ever cuddled with anyone before?"

It was like she could hear his thoughts.

"No… But if this is cuddling, then I like it." Harry answered honestly and added with a moment of boldness, "Can we do this more often?"

His question made Hermione laugh. If it was anyone else, it would make him very nervous but he knew that she wasn't laughing at him, she was just enjoying the moment. Hermione would never laugh at him for something like that.

"Did I ever tell you how much I like the Post-War Harry?" she asked abruptly, craning her neck to be able to stare in his eyes.

"What do you mean?" he asked, his voice came out hoarse, NOW he was nervous. She was so close, all he had to do was raise his head and his lips would meet hers. But he couldn't do that, not yet.

"You are not afraid of feeling anymore." Hermione stated. She had decided to turn in his arm and cross her arms on his chest to rest her head on them. She was half lying on him now.

"You mean I was before?" Harry was having a hard time trying to concentrate on her words while his body wanted to concentrate on other - _ahem-_ attributes of her.

"Weren't you?" She asked back, fortunately for Harry, she didn't wait for an answer before continuing, "You were afraid of losing the people you cared about, all of us were but naturally yours was a bigger fear."

Harry looked into her eyes darkened with the night, "Were you afraid of losing me?"

"Are you really asking this?" she sounded somewhat offended. "It was –and probably is- one of my biggest fears since-" she stopped herself before she could finish her sentence. If she hadn't averted her eyes, Harry probably would have overlooked it but not now, not when she was acting like she had let one of her deepest secrets slip out.

"Yeah? You can't turn back now, Miss Granger. What are you hiding?" Harry enquired, putting his arms around her waist in order to prevent her escape.

"Nothing important." She tried to brush it off but when he didn't give in she continued in a whisper, as if she was wishing for him not to hear, "It was my boggart."

"Your boggart was losing me?" He half-asked half-stated, it was becoming a habit of him. Upon seeing Hermione's nod, he elaborated his question, "So, you're saying your boggart changed after third year. But where did you encounter another boggart? In the Grimmauld Place?"

"I didn't." Hermione's voice was even lighter than before, making Harry strain to hear it. "It didn't change."

"But I remember you saying your boggart was McGonagall telling you that you'd failed all of your classes."

Hermione cleared her throat as if collecting her confidence and finally looked in his eyes again after what felt like forever to Harry.

"I didn't say she said I'd failed all of my classes."

"But-"

"I said she said I'd failed everything." Her simple words had so much meaning behind them, Harry had to stop for a second to comprehend them.

"You… You mean your boggart was failing… in everything."

"More specifically, failing you." She murmured but this time her tone wasn't due to insecurity, they were so close, she just didn't need to speak any louder than a whisper. "Failing meant losing you. And I couldn't bear that thought –I still can't."

Harry felt like all words had left him. He couldn't do anything other than stare at Hermione. He had never seen her from this close before. She was even more beautiful. Before he could collect his thoughts, he felt Hermione shiver in his arms.

"Do you want to go inside?" He heard himself ask. Although he didn't want to go back just yet, it was getting late and he certainly didn't want Hermione to get sick because of him.

Hermione nodded and pushed herself up from his chest, helping Harry up along the way. They shook off the snow from their cloaks before starting towards the castle door.

As they were walking Harry saw Hermione shiver once again. With a confidence gained from their night together, Harry put his arm around Hermione to keep her warm. _And to keep her close._

"I hope you don't get sick because of me. It'll be a tough week." Harry said, rubbing her arm up and down to warm her.

Hermione took out her wand and with a smooth movement Harry felt himself warm up. He reluctantly let go of her. After all, she didn't need his _embrace_ to keep warm anymore.

"Oh, I guess that's more practical."

Hermione laughed and snuggled closer to him, putting her arms around his middle. "But I think this is better."

Harry put his arm back around her. He was feeling feelings he never felt before. "Much better."

* * *

Harry felt Hermione draw back as they neared the entrance of the Gryffindor Common Room. Since the corridors were mostly deserted due to the late hour, they could hold hands all the way back but it seemed like she didn't want to risk being seen. Just before they turned the corner to the portrait of the Fat Lady, Hermione stopped, making Harry stop with her.

"This was a lovely night. Thank you." She said, giving his hand a one last squeeze.

"The night isn't over yet." Harry smiled. He really didn't want it to be over.

"No, it isn't over for us as best friends but I feel like it's too early to give them any ideas." She smiled but he could see the sorrowful look in her eyes. "I don't think I'm ready for questions I don't know the answers of. Neither are you."

"You're right." Harry sighed. "But it won't always be like this, right?" His hopeful tone must have done the deed as Hermione gave him a short hug.

"Of course not. First we'll get comfortable with us, then they'll know."

"OK." he said, letting go of her. Just as Hermione made a move to go, Harry stopped her. "Oh, and Hermione. I definitely felt sparks."

"Wha-" Harry pecked her cheek before she could even finish her sentence and proceeded to the portrait hole, leaving a dazed Hermione behind.

* * *

 **A/N: I'm sorry! I know it's been so long you probably had to go back for a quick reminder but, guys, believe me, I'm doing my best. Trust me, I didn't neglect my stories, I've been writing this for the past three months. It's just... My life isn't going exactly how I'd like it to go right now BUT I'm doing my best. Writing fanfiction is -and always has been- my safe haven. Believe me when I say being busy and having writer's block at the same time really sucks. But do you know what is good for curing writer's block? REVIEWS! Just saying...**

 **Love you and hope to see you soon(er than three months).  
**

 **Take care, bye -xo**


	5. Chapter 5

" _But it won't always be like this, right?" His hopeful tone must have done the deed as Hermione gave him a short hug._

" _Of course not. First we'll get comfortable with us, then they'll know."_

" _OK." he said, letting go of her. Just as Hermione made a move to go, Harry stopped her. "Oh, and Hermione, I definitely felt sparks."_

" _Wha-" Harry pecked her cheek before she could even finish her sentence and proceeded to the portrait hole, leaving a dazed Hermione behind._

 **CHAPTER 5:** **Deliberate Stares and Accidental Realisations**

"There you are."

"Harry!" Hermione shrieked, her hand going to her heart. "Don't scare me like that!" She'd managed to lower her voice to a whisper at the same time making it sound like she was scolding him.

After waking up at half past six in the morning, Harry had decided to spend the morning in the library with Hermione. He didn't even need to look at the Marauder's Map to know she was there, studying at her favourite table. Of course she was up at six o'clock to benefit from an empty library. Even Madame Pince wouldn't come to her desk before 8 o'clock. So after a quick shower and a stop by the Great Hall, Harry had found her between the aisles about Arithmancy.

"Sorry." He grinned sheepishly. "And good morning." Without waiting for a response, Harry leaned down and pecked Hermione on the cheek.

"Good morning to you, too" Hermione smiled, her cheeks were pink due to Harry's unexpected show of affection. "I didn't know you could wake up early without having the Dark Lord himself interfering in your dreams." It was her way of asking if he had a nightmare. Harry smiled and took the books in her hands.

"This time someone else interfered in my dreams." Hermione raised an eyebrow at his remark.

"Oh, really? Who is it?" She asked, playfully bumping his shoulder with hers. Harry laughed, surprisingly she was in a good mood.

"Wouldn't you like to know?" he grinned and bumped her shoulder back.

"Oh, I already know. I just want to hear it from you." Hermione said sweetly as she gave him another book. Harry's grin widened, she really was in a good mood which was great considering the upcoming Arithmancy exam and its effects on Hermione.

"In your dreams, Granger."

"More like in _your_ dreams, Potter." Hermione's retort made him laugh out loud. She _really_ did know who was in his dreams last night.

"You're in a good mood." He changed the topic. It was for the better if they didn't delve into his dreams.

"Yeah, I had a nice sleep. Very pleasant dreams, I must say." She said the last part with a sidelong glance at him.

"Oh, maybe you'd like to tell me about your dreams over breakfast." Harry said as he steered her towards their table.

"I can't come to breakfast, Harry. I have to study."

"I know, that's why I brought the breakfast to you." He said proudly as he showed her their table.

"No, you didn't." Hermione said in disbelief. "Harry! If Madame Pince sees this, we'll be forever banned from the library."

"Don't worry, she won't be here till eight. We have more than an hour to eat and get rid of the evidence." Harry grinned cheekily. He pulled the heavy mahogany chair for Hermione to sit and then sat at the other side of the table.

"Oh, believe me, she'll know. I swear she can smell the crumbs on your shirt from a mile." Hermione said as she eyed the scones Harry was unwrapping from the napkins.

"Come on, Hermione. You can concentrate better with a full stomach." Harry took a bite of the scone and made a sound of pleasure to persuade Hermione. "Mmmm… You should try some." He held out another one to her.

"Don't talk with your mouth full." Hermione laughed as she accepted the scone. "And don't act like you haven't eaten scones for breakfast every day since first year." Hermione took a bite and her eyes opened wide. "Oh my God! This is so good! Why is this so good?!"

Harry laughed at her reaction and popped the rest of the scone in his mouth. "Could be because they are forbidden."

Hermione rolled her eyes at his answer and took another bite. "Mmmm…. Thanks, Harry. I didn't realise how hungry I am."

"I have coffee too." Harry grinned as he took out a flask from his bag along with two cups. "I know you prefer tea at breakfast but you also prefer coffee when you are studying so… I went with coffee…"

Hermione's smile was enough indication that he made the right choice. "Where did you find this flask?" She said as she was examining the warm bottle.

"Well, I transfigured a tea cup at the Great Hall." Harry said, his hand going through his messy hair as it tended to do whenever he felt self-conscious. Upon seeing Hermione's unbelieving (and impressed) look, he laughed slightly. "You are not the only one with tricks, Hermione."

"Well, it seems like you don't need that Transfiguration tutoring at all." She said with one eyebrow arched.

"What? No! I do! I certainly do need it. I haven't even started studying yet." Harry's quick response made Hermione laugh. She carefully poured the coffee into the cups and pushed one of them towards him.

"Then start studying now." She said with a serious tone and a pointed look but the glint in her eyes showed him how much she was enjoying her morning with him.

"Okay okay. I'll start. But we are still studying tomorrow, right?" He asked, trying to put on his best puppy dog look.

"Yeah, we will. Just don't look at me like that, I'm trying to concentrate." Hermione said and took another bite from her scone to unsuccessfully hide her amused smile. Mimicking her movements, Harry also opened his Transfiguration book to where he closed it yesterday and hid his own smile behind it.

Things were going great. Actually they were going so great, he was afraid something was going to happen and turn everything upside down. Just like it did for all his life.

After living with the Dursleys for eleven years and feeling like a misfit, receiving his Hogwarts letter was like a breath of fresh air after drowning in the ocean. Just as he thought he was finally going to be with people who are like him, he had learned that he wasn't like them at all, at least not in their eyes. Being the Chosen One, having to face Voldemort at the age of eleven was like returning to that ocean once again. Only this time, he had his friends who kept him on the surface.

Again, just as he thought he was going to have a peaceful life after defeating Voldemort, he had returned a year later and again two years later. It was like his life was a cycle and no matter what he did, he lived the same things over and over again.

But this time was different, right? Voldemort was gone forever, he made sure of that. He couldn't come back to drown his happiness. Not again, not this time. But what if being unhappy was his destiny, what if it wasn't about Voldemort? Was something else going to come up and ruin his life?

Harry's eyes drifted to Hermione. She was taking a sip from her coffee. She always savoured her first few sips. Just like now. Her eyes closed with content as she swallowed. She was so beautiful, Harry was once again baffled at his own blindness. How could he have missed her when she was right in front of his eyes all these years?

"You are doing it again."

Harry shook out of his thoughts upon hearing Hermione's voice.

"What?"

"You're staring." Hermione said, giving him a pointed look.

"So?" Harry responded with a look of his own.

"So, you are making me self-conscious." Hermione rolled her eyes as she opened another book.

"Well, you are making me you-conscious but you don't see me complaining." Harry replied with a shit-eating grin.

"That's not a word." Hermione said, trying to hide her amusement behind her serious face.

"You know what? I think I can understand Krum better now." Harry continued his mission of distracting Hermione. He knew she was going to go back to her studying soon, so he wanted to take as much as he could before having to bury his head in a book.

"What?" She asked this time.

"Watching you study is so… so easy." He was having a hard time finding the right words to explain himself and it was making him regret talking his thoughts out loud.

"Easy? What do you mean?" Of course she wasn't going to leave it at that.

"I don't know… It's like I can sit here and do nothing else. Being 'more of a physical being', you know?" Harry said, quoting Hermione's words from four years ago.

"Do you know why Viktor and I didn't work out?" Hermione asked with a pointed look above her book. Harry laughed nervously at her meaningful question.

"Okay, I got it. No staring."

"Nice."

After a few minutes of silent reading, Harry reached his endurance limit of a morning study session.

"Do you have much to study?"

Hermione nodded without looking up from the parchment she had been taking notes on.

"Do you mind if I go?"

This time the answer was a negative shake of her head.

"Okay then. I will see if Ron is awake. We can spend some time flying. If he is talking with me again, that is. I don't understand, it's you who tricked him into studying. What did I do to him?" Harry asked more to himself than Hermione.

Last night when they had returned to the Common Room, Ron wasn't talking with them. Apparently it had taken him four chapters until someone asked him what he was doing and for him to find out there was actually no homework.

"When you see him, tell him to finish the last two chapters. It will be enough revision for the exam." Hermione said, again her eyes were directed at her work.

"And have him hex my bullocks off? No thank you, I'm good." Harry answered as he put his book back in his bag. He hadn't read a single line since yesterday afternoon and although he felt a little guilty about it, he was just not in the mood to study. _'I will do it in the afternoon.'_ He thought as he stood up and slung his bag on his shoulder. He had one more thing to say. He wanted to discuss this since last night but he didn't know how to bring it up. Especially when she was this engrossed in her studies.

"Did you want to say something?" Hermione asked, her eyes that were glued to the pages before her until a few moments ago were now boring into his own. He had her whole focus.

"Umm… Yes… Hermione, I-"

"You want to tell Ron." Hermione finished his sentence. Harry sighed and sat back down.

"I'm not comfortable with hiding this from him." He elaborated, all the while playing with his fingers that were resting on the table.

"I know. Me too." Hermione's hand covered his own as she mimicked his sigh. Her hand was a lot smaller than his. _'When did this happen?_ ' Harry turned his hand to squeeze hers lightly.

"So?" He asked, trying to hide the hopeful tone of his voice. He didn't want to pressure her.

"We can tell him, if you want." Hermione said the words he wanted to hear. Harry let out a relieved sigh.

"Really?"

"Yeah, I understand. He is your best friend. You don't want to hide anything from him. Besides it'll be easier if he knows." Hermione finished with a small smile. Harry jumped from his seat and grabbed Hermione's face from both sides, making her cheeks squish.

"Thank you, 'Mione." He said as he pulled her towards him and kissed both of her cheeks.

"Umm… You're welcome." A very flustered Hermione mumbled, her eyes were widened with surprise, her dilated pupils making them seem almost black.

Harry let go of her when he realised his impulsive action was not missed on Hermione's part. _'You grabbed her, how do you expect her to miss that?'_

"Umm… A-hem, okay then. I better go and see if Ron is awake. You know, umm, Quidditch and stuff." Harry murmured, he could feel his face burning. He took a step back towards the entrance, "Umm… See you later!" And bolted out of the library, leaving Hermione alone with her books on Arithmancy and thoughts on him.

* * *

"She is completely mental, I'm telling you. She takes pleasure in making me suffer."

Ron had been ranting about Hermione for the past hour or so. After having breakfast at the Great Hall (a second one for Harry, the scones weren't as good), they had decided to go flying and Harry was thanking his lucky stars that Ron's anger was not directed at him anymore. Until he started going off on Hermione. Harry had drowned out his voice after a few minutes, concentrating on the sound of the wind whooshing in his ears instead. He knew Ron didn't mean anything bad so he decided against defending Hermione. Besides she _was_ mental. A cute one at that.

"And she also made you study all day yesterday. She has to understand that we all have lives outside the library. We are not fixated on studying our brains out like her."

Harry sighed and once again turned back to his thoughts. She looked so happy that morning when he said he brought her coffee. He made a mental note to do that more often and also to kiss her more often. She always got so flustered when he did that, her eyes widening, her cheeks getting all flushed. Sometimes, he could even leave her speechless and Hermione Granger was never speechless.

"Harry, mate, are you listening?"

"Hmm? Oh, yeah! I'm listening." Harry shook himself out of his thoughts. It seemed like Ron was over his daily complaining of Hermione's study habits.

"What are you thinking about?" Ron asked, slowing down his broom to a more comfortable speed for a two-sided conversation.

"Nothing. I was listening to you." Harry lied as he, too, slowed down.

"What was I talking about then?" Ron continued his interrogation. He was finally done with his rant.

"Umm… Hermione?" Harry asked. After all she was the topic of their morning since Ron woke up. Even the food couldn't stop him from speaking non-stop about Hermione.

"Yeah. Mental she is." Ron said as if he hadn't made that conclusion just seconds ago for the umpteenth time. "And scary."

"And cute." Harry bit his tongue but it was too late. The words had already left his mouth.

"What did you say?" Ron got closer to him as if he couldn't hear him properly over the wind.

"Nothing." Harry tried his luck. Maybe he really didn't hear him.

"You called Hermione cute."

' _No such luck.'_ Harry thought. He could hear the disbelief in Ron's voice despite the whizzing of the wind and that disbelief was what made him stick by his words. "Well, she is."

The disbelief in Ron's face slowly left its place to a smirk. "Mate, do you have something you want to tell me?"

"Umm…" He had something he wanted to tell him but he hadn't planned it to be this early. And without Hermione.

"You fancy her, don't you?" Ron stopped his broom suddenly, making Harry go a few feet without noticing. "Does she know?" He continued without waiting for Harry to come back.

"Umm…" Harry could feel his face burning and he knew it had nothing to do with the abrupt halt of the cold wind.

"Blimey! You are together! Since when?" Ron shouted. His blue eyes were wide open with bafflement. But it was the big smile that reassured Harry that Ron was more excited than angry.

"I asked her yesterday and she accepted." Harry said simply, subconsciously deciding against telling him they were giving a shot at being a couple for only two weeks.

' _It doesn't matter anyways. We'll still be together after two weeks.'_

"Congratulations, mate!" Ron patted his back, almost making him fall off his broom with the unexpected force. "But you know she is mental, right?"

As he was trying to supress his laugh, Harry noticed a figure walking towards them on the Quidditch pitch. "Why don't you tell that to Hermione?" he grinned before directing his broom to the ground. "I'm sure she has a nice reply to that."

"You told him." Hermione said just as they set foot on the ground.

Harry didn't need to ask how she knew for one look at Ron's face told him everything. He was grinning from ear to ear while wiggling his eyebrows. Harry elbowed him. He didn't want Hermione to receive detention because she had hexed Ron. He also didn't want Ron to end up in the Hospital Wing but at this point the idiot was deserving it with his actions.

"I didn't told him. He realised." Harry felt the need to clarify. She hadn't smiled at him when she saw him and that could only mean trouble.

"Yeah, I have a brain too, you know? I can think and realise things. Like fake homework and lying friends." Ron interfered. It sounded like he was waiting to say this since last night.

Harry cringed. Things weren't going exactly as he would have liked them to go.

"I'm sorry, okay?" Hermione's apology wasn't something Harry expected. Although the last part made the apology sound more like a scolding, it was still a step towards making amends. "Besides it was for your own good. It's not like you would have studied all of those otherwise." Harry mentally winced. Of course she wasn't going to take a step and not poke Ron when she was close enough. "And-"

"And you wanted to be alone with Harry." Ron's direct words made Hermione redden.

"Actually it was me who wanted to be alone with her." Harry interjected. He didn't want Hermione to regret her decision of telling Ron.

"I wanted to be alone too." Hermione replied looking directly at Harry. How could she manage to make him feel like he was standing on fire in the midst of snow with just six words and a piercing gaze?

"Okay, this is too mushy for me. I'm out of here." Ron's voice was enough to pour water on that fire. But before he could open his mouth to say something, anything, to soften the uncomfortable air, Hermione spoke in her crisp tone that she usually reserved for Ron,

"Actually I remembered now that I missed a chapter, I should go and finish it. You enjoy your day off. And finish the last two chapters, Ron." She added before hurrying back to the castle.

"Hermione forgets a chapter? She has it bad for you, mate." Ron elbowed Harry with a grin as if he wasn't the one riling Hermione up a few seconds ago.

Harry stared after the young woman walking away from him. For some reason, he didn't think Hermione's affections towards him was the deal at all. Not even Ron's provocation was the problem. There was something else that was bothering Hermione and Harry could only hope it wasn't as serious as he feared it to be.

* * *

"Check mate."

This was the fifth time Harry had heard Ron say that that night. The fourth one was like 10 minutes ago.

"At least you didn't try to move your knight diagonally this time. That thing is dangerous with that sword." Ron continued, referring to the incident he had with his knight when he wanted the piece to move diagonally for the third time and it had thrown his little sword towards him, his glasses being the only thing guarding his eye.

"Sorry, I just can't concentrate." Harry murmured absentmindedly. His eyes were drawn once again to the portrait hole as it did for the past hour. He hadn't seen Hermione since lunchtime and that was a brief encounter with her eating under five minutes and returning to the library 'to study'.

"She is fine, mate. Don't worry." Ron said as he put the pieces in their places once again. "She'll come any minute and I'll talk to her. I know what's up with her."

Before Harry could object, the portrait hole opened and Hermione climbed in. Harry hid his face behind his hand as Ron winked at him before calling Hermione to where they were sitting. Although he meant well, Harry was afraid that Ron was going to make things worse. He just hoped Hermione wasn't stressed about her exam on top of her disappointment in him.

"Hi." She said in a light tone. If Harry didn't knew her, he would think everything was fine. But he knew her and he could see in her features something was bothering her.

She put her books on the floor beside the sofa Harry and Ron were sitting with the chess board between them. Harry made a move to remove the board so she could sit but Hermione shook her head and took one of the pillows.

"No, continue playing, I'll sit here." She said, as she put the pillow down and sat with her back against the sofa. Harry opened his mouth to protest but Hermione chose that moment to rest her head on his leg, leaving Harry gaping like a fish. It wasn't unseen of Hermione to show affection to him in public but this was different. Firstly, they were dating now and secondly, she was cross with him. At least that was what he thought. As Harry's hands itched to run through her wild curls, he forced himself to return to the game Ron had once again started. Seriously how many times the guy had to win to finally call it a night?

Harry made a random move without paying attention to Ron's pieces. His mind was on Hermione. His eyes were on Hermione. If only his hands were on Hermione, too. Harry stopped himself before his thoughts went any further. She was just leaning on his leg. She wasn't even looking at him. Her eyes were closed as if she was sleeping. He could feel her breathing, it wasn't deep enough for her to be sleeping.

"So, Herms, about this morning." Harry felt Hermione stiffen upon hearing the nickname she so hated but apart from that she didn't show any sign of hearing Ron. "You don't have to worry. I'm okay with you two dating." Harry's eyes opened wide. He looked around to see if anyone heard what Ron had said, his hand clutching the pawn he was just about to move.

"Ouch!" Harry dropped the chess piece and sucked on his finger where it bit him. At least the few people that were still in the Common Room were at the other side of the room, busy studying with no chance of hearing them.

"Ron, be silent, no one knows about this." Hermione said, she had finally opened her eyes but her calmness was still there.

"Oops, sorry." Ron smiled sheepishly. "But seriously, I'm fine with… you-know-what. You don't have to hide from me."

Hermione smiled politely at him and nodded. "Thanks Ron, that means a lot." And closed her eyes again, indicating the end of the conversation.

Having got the clue for once, Ron didn't say anything else for a few minutes. Until Harry made another careless move that put his King in open danger.

"Check mate!" Ron half yawned, half exclaimed. Harry ignored the glare of his King as it got dragged off the board by Ron's pieces. "Seriously Herms, are you fine?"

Harry's hands froze over the pieces he was collecting in order to prevent Ron from starting another game. Little did he know it was his mouth he should have feared. He felt Hermione once again stiffen against his leg.

"Call me that once again and I promise you won't be fine, Ronald." Her words combined with her deathly glare left Ron dumbstruck for a moment.

"Ahem… Okay guys. I think that's all from me, I'm going to bed." He said and went upstairs after murmuring a quick goodnight.

"You scared the shit out of him." Harry grinned after Ron was out of sight. He moved down to the floor next to Hermione but regretted his decision the moment he lost contact with her body.

"Good. He should be scared." Hermione said seriously, her tone made Harry worry for his redheaded friend. However that worry was short lived when Hermione rested her head on his shoulder. "He talks too much for his own good."

Harry chuckled as he remembered how he spent that morning. "Hermione?"

"Really Harry, I'm fine." She said, her tone left no room for argument. Harry sighed and turned his gaze to the flames dancing in the fireplace, the crackling of the logs filling the silence.

Between watching the orange-red flames and listening to the comforting breaths of Hermione, Harry gathered his courage.

"I know that isn't the real problem," He whispered, "what Ron said. I know there is another thing that upset you." When she didn't respond, Harry put a finger under her chin and made her look into his eyes. "And I know you are not fine."

After a few seconds of intense gazing (from Harry's part) and careful thinking (from Hermione's part), Hermione took a deep breath and once again leaned her head on his shoulder.

"Sometimes I feel like I'm still not one of you." Hermione whispered. If her head wasn't resting beside his ear, Harry would have a hard time understanding her. "I know it's not true. You like me as much as you like Ron. We are your best friends. But I can't help it..."

"Hermione…" Harry wanted to object but Hermione continued as if he didn't speak.

"I guess that's what happens when you have two males as best friends. They become each other's best friends and you choose one of them to be your best friend." There wasn't any sort of sadness in her voice. She sounded like she had thought about this a lot ('O _f course she did, she is Hermione Granger'_ ) and she had come to terms with it.

"You are my best friend too." Harry couldn't let her accept this as her truth. It was not the truth at all.

"Harry-"

"No, Hermione." This time Harry didn't let her talk, "I won't let you think like this about our friendship. You are my best friend. You know what? You are more than my best friend. Ron is my best friend, you are my everything."

Hermione's intake of breath made Harry realise how his words had sounded. He didn't care.

"I don't have many people around me who knows the real me, Hermione." Harry continued. He was somehow glad he couldn't see her eyes when he was saying these things. Although he was more open about his feelings to Hermione, he could still get embarrassed. "You are the one who was with me from the beginning, you are the one I go to for all my troubles, you are the voice of reason for me. I love Ron with all my heart but you are the closest thing to a family I've ever had."

A shiver ran down his spine when he felt Hermione's lips on his jaw. "Oh, Harry…" Hermione whispered. Her voice was so low, it was almost like he felt the words instead of hearing them. "Thank you."

"Also I'm not attracted to Ron which is another reason for you to not to feel like you are the second best." Harry half joked but almost regretted it when he felt Hermione's hot breath on his neck when she laughed silently. Almost… Because apart from the giddy feeling in his stomach, having Hermione close enough to feel her breath was the most amazing thing in the world.

"I'm sorry for reacting like that this morning." Hermione said. Before Harry could release the breath he had hold seconds ago, Hermione's fingers in his palm made his breath hitch once more.

Harry cleared his throat. _'Concentrate, Potter. This is a serious topic.'_

"It's okay. I understand. We were supposed to tell him together." He closed his fingers around hers. "But I didn't say anything, well, I did say that I thought you were cute but he figured out the rest." Harry admitted.

"You said you found me cute? To Ron?" Hermione asked amusedly. She had raised her head to look at his now red face.

"More like I blurted it out." He smiled sheepishly, his free hand that wasn't toying with hers ran through his hair.

"That's cute." Hermione said, returning her head to its resting place on his shoulder.

A few minutes passed with them staring at the fireplace. Hermione's fingers were still lightly caressing his palm, seizing all of his senses and leaving him no other choice but concentrating on the feelings she was creating on his palm and in his chest.

"I like it when you stare at me."

Hermione's voice made him snap out of his thoughts.

"What?" But the feeling was still there, making it hard for him to concentrate.

"While I am studying… I like it when you stare, that's why I can't concentrate." This time it was Harry who leaned back to see her face. Her cheeks were pink and the blazing fire was not the cause. "With Viktor, it was just annoying." Hermione continued, averting her gaze from his amused one. "It's different with you."

Harry took a moment to stare at her face, testing the waters to see if she would make him look away. Instead she returned her eyes back to his, challenging him to resume his little game.

"Does that mean I can stare at you when you study?" He asked cheekily, his own embarrassment from a few minutes ago forgotten.

"No." She said pointedly. He could see her lips tugging upwards.

"Maybe I can sneak glances." Harry tried his luck. He was enjoying their little exchange a little too much.

"I said no, Harry." Hermione said with her end-of-the-conversation tone which lost its effect when she once again rested her head on his shoulder. "Okay, you can steal glances but if it distracts me, you'll stop."

Harry laughed at her quick change of mind. "Deal." He turned his head and lightly kissed her forehead. He couldn't wait for their _study date_.

* * *

 **A/N: Hi, everyone! Long time no see, huh? Ok, straight to the apologies: I'm so sorry. I know it's been soooo long but life happened and I just went along with it. I'm still going along with it. I hope there are still a few people waiting for this story. I think if you are reading this you are one them so THANK YOU, YOU LOYAL PERSON!**

 **Currently I am studying for a job interview/test (I need positive vibes, wish me luck!) so I won't be able to start writing the new chapter for at least a few weeks but as you can see that doesn't mean I will abandon my story. Don't lose hope, I come back eventually!**

 **Also I'd like to thank all of the readers who left a review (and WILL leave a review *hint hint*), they all mean so much to me! Special thanks to warg14, Lol3hp and ll Euphoria ll, your reviews helped me at a time I felt like I couldn't put two words together.**

 **I don't know if you are still reading this unnecessarily long author's note but if you are, know that I love you and I hope to see you soon(er than five months)!**

 **Take care, bye –xo**


	6. Chapter 6

**CHAPTER 6: Unsought Nicknames and Stolen Kisses**

Harry fidgeted at his place on the cold stone floor. His eyes were going over the words and charts that he oh-so adamantly avoided for the last two days. Nothing had changed in those days, he was still having trouble understanding them. He threw a glance at the classroom door, there was still plenty of time for the exam to finish. But it was Hermione he was waiting for, she never needed all the time the professors gave them for their exams. Unless she felt inspired and wrote her own questions to answer.

Harry chuckled to himself as he turned a few pages back to study the chart again. As far as he could tell, he was doing everything right. He took the wand he had rested behind his ear (Sometimes, Luna could be a bad influence) and pointed it at the quill he had on his other palm. He flicked his wand clockwise and made a sharp stop, all the while concentrating on turning the quill into a feather.

Nothing.

They were learning non-verbal transfiguration and according to the book, the easiest transformations were made between related things. So Harry was trying to turn his quill into its original form for the last hour and still hadn't managed anything close. The twice broken and once burned quill was still that, a quill that was repaired too many times.

Harry sighed and turned the pages again. He must be skipping some important information. He started reading the chapter from the start, his fingers absentmindedly playing with the corner of the page. He didn't want Hermione to think he had done nothing and left everything to their study date. And he also didn't want to fail this exam which seemed very likely at the moment. He forced himself to concentrate on the words instead of stressing over the exam.

"Fuck!" He cursed at the sudden pain, shooting a furious glare at the papercut on his thumb.

"You get used to it after a while."

Harry directed his stare from his mildly bleeding finger to the source of the voice. Hermione was standing a few feet away, her book bag was slinging from her shoulder and there was a soft smile on her lips.

"The paper cut. You get used to it after a while." She closed the gap between them and knelt beside him, taking his hand between hers. With an expert swish of her wand and a muttered incantation later, his thumb was better than ever. "It happens so often to me, I learned how to heal them."

"Always the practical one." Harry grinned. The pain had subdued immediately. "But you could kiss it too, you know, to make the pain go away."

The light colouring of her cheeks and the slight smile on her lips were what encouraged Harry as he clasped her hand in his.

"Actually it still hurts a little." He murmured, pulling her softly towards him. He heard her gasp at the sudden closeness.

Hermione's eyes moved from their clasped hands to his eyes. Harry could see the different emotions swirling in them: excitement, confusion, surprise, indecision… And then they flickered down to his lips for a split second and that was enough to make _his_ breath hitch in his throat.

And the sound was enough to make Hermione come to her senses. She pulled back with a flustered smile.

"If I knew you were waiting for me, I'd come out earlier. I was just killing time."

"I take it that it went well." Harry grinned, trying to hide his disappointment as he put his book in his bag. He was so close, just a few inches more and he would have tasted her lips for the first time.

"I answered all of the questions."

"And I expected nothing less." Harry's proud response was welcomed with a pretty blush she tried to hide behind her curls.

"So did you study?" Hermione changed the topic, pulling him to his feet as she got up. They started walking towards the Great Hall, it was still early enough to catch breakfast.

"I did but I can't say I've been successful in my tries." Harry sighed. Hermione squeezed his hand.

"It's okay, we'll figure out what you are doing wrong." Hermione's confident reassurance filled Harry with comfort. He smiled in response. "Did you finish with the theoretical part?"

"Yeah, I know the theory. I think I can answer the questions. The problem is with the practice. I can't do non-verbal spells."

"Alright, then we'll be in the library all afternoon, practising non-verbal transfiguration until you can do it in your sleep."

"I hope an afternoon is enough."

"Come on now! Have some confidence, you're He-Who-Defeated-Voldemort-With-An-Expelliarmus." Hermione bumped his hip with hers.

"Hey! You know that's my least favourite nickname." Harry bumped back, trying to hold back his smile.

"You mean you have a favourite one?" Hermione asked with a grin. Her eyes were twinkling with mischief.

"No." Harry turned his head away with mock hurt. If Hermione was in a playful mood, he could tag along. "Alright, Hogwarts' Star Seeker is nice."

Hermione laughed, "If you say so."

"What's your favourite one?" Harry grinned.

They were still holding hands despite the few people scattered along the corridor. Their affection for each other wasn't something big enough to start gossip around school. Both Harry and Ron could be seen walking with their arms around Hermione's shoulders or Hermione holding onto their arms. But for Harry, this was different. He could feel the gentle pressure of her fingers tangled with his, his thumb occasionally grazing her palm. This was intimate.

"Oh," Hermione said, her brows furrowed in thought. "The Boy Who Can Finally Live was nice." She answered at last.

"Yeah, the Quibbler did a good job with that." Harry smiled, remembering the article he did with Luna after the war. To say the least, it was an interesting experience. "But I'm talking about your nicknames. What's your favourite one?"

"Pfft, I don't have nicknames."

"Yeah, right, the Brightest Witch of Her Age."

"But people don't call me that. It's just you guys." Hermione answered.

She let go of his hand as they entered the Great Hall. It was mildly crowded with half the castle taking their exams. They found Ron sitting close to the doors and stuffing his face with all the food he can get without leaving his seat.

"So?" Harry asked as he sat beside Ron.

"So, it doesn't count." Hermione took the seat across from them.

"What doesn't count?" Ron asked, his mouth was full but they could understand him thanks to years of experience.

"Hermione thinks the Brightest Witch of Her Age isn't her nickname." Harry said, as he passed the tea cup he filled to Hermione and took the pumpkin juice she got for him. Both muttering a silent thank you to each other.

"Well, it is." Ron said matter-of-factly. "Although I like Miss Killed-Or-Worse-Expelled better."

Shooting a deathly glare at Harry who was laughing/suffocating over his pumpkin juice, Hermione humphed, "Well, that is even more illegitimate."

"Huh?"

Harry's problem with the pumpkin juice got bigger upon Ron's confusion with Hermione's big words.

"Nobody calls me that." Hermione sighed in resignation. "Alright… I guess, the Brains of the Golden Trio is nice." She had directed this at Harry, answering his earlier question.

Harry, finally able to breathe without coughing, nodded, "Yeah, that's a good one. Better than Won-Won."

"Hey!"

This time it was Hermione's turn to laugh while Ron shot daggers at Harry.

"Alright, Mr. Most Eligible Bachelor of the Wizarding World!" Ron's words silenced them for a second but upon catching Hermione's eyes over the table, they began laughing again, harder than ever.

"Sorry, Ron but still better than Won-Won."

Ron's answer to Hermione was angrily stuffing his mouth with sausage.

"Wait a minute," Harry said, sobering up. "If you are the Brains, what are we?"

Harry's question was met with silence from both sides. Hermione raised her eyebrows as she took a deliberate sip of her tea.

"I don't know. Not the brains, that's for sure." She answered before taking a bite from her scone. "Why are these not as good?" Harry heard her mutter.

"Well, I can be the Muscles." Ron joined in the conversation once again, eager to find himself a new nickname. Harry was going to object but compared to his lean figure, Ron was definitely the muscles of their friend group.

"Okay but what am I then?" He sighed, pointlessly hung-up on the topic. As if defining his job in their little group was the most important problem in his life. It wasn't, but it was nice to be able to obsess over something other than life and death situations.

"Oi, already bored with your other nicknames, the Golden Boy of Hogwarts?" Harry didn't have time to respond as Hermione quipped from the other side of the table,

"Leave the Chosen One alone, Ron. Tell me, are you ready for transfiguration?" Harry didn't know whether to respond Hermione's nickname war or be grateful that she made Ron shut up about it.

"Yeah, I can easily get an A, maybe if I'm lucky an E."

Harry turned towards Ron with wide eyes, "Can you do the non-verbal transfiguration?" How come Ron could do it without proper studying and he couldn't?

Ron nodded as he took out his wand. He flicked his wand towards his knife. The knife suddenly grew three prongs like a fork however its side was still sharp like a knife.

"See easily an A." Ron said, lifting his real fork to his mouth to take another bite of the sausage. Harry took the transfigured knife in his hand, he couldn't even do this.

"You can do better, Ron." Hermione's voice broke through his thoughts. He had to do better than this, too. This was okay for a beginner but it wasn't functional. He didn't want an A, he wanted to be able to do non-verbal spells.

"Yeah, but it's enough to pass." Ron said with a shrug. "I have all my life to work on it but only half a day to study. So for now, this will do."

Hermione rolled her eyes over her tea cup but refrained from saying anything. Harry knew she had a lot to say but over the years, Hermione and Ron had learned what to say and what not to say to minimise their arguments.

"What? An A is not enough for you, Herms?" Well, maybe Ron had a long way ahead of him to get there.

Harry's eyes widened as Ron's fork got stuck in his mouth as he was taking a bite from his sausage. Hermione calmly put her wand away and took another bite from her scone.

"God, why are these not as good?"

* * *

Harry rubbed his eyes beneath his glasses as Hermione repaired his broken quill once again. He had lost count how many times he had to repair his quill for the last two hours.

They were sitting at the plush red sofa in front of the fire like last night but this time, Ron was taking a nap, Hermione was studying for their DADA exam and Harry was driving himself crazy with his failures.

"Harry?" Hermione's concerned voice made him look behind his fingers. "Are you sure you don't want my help? We don't have to wait for the evening to start, you know?"

This was the third time, Hermione made this offer. Harry had kindly refused all of them because he didn't want to steal her time from studying for other exams. It was getting harder to refuse her help.

"I'm good, 'Mione. You finish studying for Defence, then we can study together." Harry said as he concentrated once again on his quill. With a flick of his wand, his battered quill caught on fire. Before Harry could do anything other than grunt in frustration, Hermione put out the small fire.

"Come on, let's go." She said as she pulled him to his feet. "We both know we don't have to study for Defence, this is more important."

Without letting go of his hand, Hermione steered them out of the portrait hole, towards the library.

"I don't understand." Harry whined as they were waiting for the stairs to stop moving. "I'm doing everything right. If I knew it was this hard, I'd start studying last week."

"It's okay." Hermione squeezed his hand as they got off the stairs before they started moving again. "It's not that hard once you get the hang of it."

"I don't understand," Harry said again, this time whispering as they had just entered the library. "How can Ron do it and I can't." Upon seeing Hermione's amused expression he continued, "I don't mean it that way."

"I know." Hermione reassured him as they settled in their usual table at the back of the library, near the Restricted Section. Because students usually preferred sitting closer to the shelves they could actually use, it was almost always deserted. As it was the case now.

"It's just…" Harry sighed and opened his book to the pages he had memorised by now. "He can do it with barely studying, at least he can do something that resembles a transfiguration. I can't even do that."

"You don't want to do 'something that resembles a transfiguration' though." Harry nodded, affirming her words. "You're not satisfied with doing things half-arsed. Contrary to Ron."

Harry nodded once again, this time with a slight smirk. This was what Hermione had swallowed that morning to avoid an argument with Ron.

"You don't like giving people an opportunity to criticise you. Because there are a lot of them, aren't there? Watching your every step, waiting for you to stumble."

"I don't care about they think." Harry said, almost as a reflex. He didn't want to care about what other people think about him.

"I know. But it still puts a pressure on you."

Hermione's words were the beginning of a comfortable silence. Harry fixed his eyes on his book, although his mind was far away, replaying Hermione's words over and over. Finally he raised his stare to her face, his eyes squinting in recognition.

"You feel like that too, don't you? That's why you can analyse how I feel so well."

"Well, my life isn't that much different than yours." Hermione shrugged. "People are expecting a lot from me, too. Miss Perfect, the Know It All, the Brightest Witch of Her Age, the best friend of the Chosen One." She winked at him on the last nickname people had labelled her with.

"And now the girlfriend of the Most Eligible Bachelor of the Wizarding World." Harry added with a small grin.

"Yeah," Hermione nodded with a smile of her own. "All of these labels, too much pressure."

"You don't have to care about them." Harry repeated his earlier words.

"Yeah," she nodded once more. "I don't care that much now. But I didn't know that a few years ago." Hermione sighed. There was a faraway look in her eyes, as if she was remembering a specific moment. "As you very well know, being eleven and alone in a world you know nothing about is a scary thing. So difficult. And to think that I had never been good at fitting in…"

Her voice had faded but Harry didn't interfere. She had things to say. Although they had talked about many things, especially after the war, they had seldom talked about their life before Hogwarts, before they had learned they belonged to another world.

"I guess what's different between you and me is that we have different coping mechanisms." She started again. Her voice was soft but Harry knew it wasn't because they were in the library. "You could easily make friends, they liked you for who you are… It was easy for you to blend in. I couldn't do that." She took a deep breath, he could hear the shakiness of it. "I… I was never good at making friends, even before I came here. So I studied, first to prove myself that I was worth their recognition, and then here, to prove that I was as good as them. That it was not important that I was a Muggleborn, I could do magic just like them."

"Even better." Harry whispered.

"Even better." Hermione laughed silently. "Until you barged in that lavatory and jumped on the back of a twelve-foot mountain troll. After that moment, I only wanted to prove myself worthy of your friendship."

Harry's mouth dropped open at that declaration. "Hermione-"

"I don't care about what other people think, Harry. You believed in me and that was enough for me." Harry shut his mouth and nodded. His hand going over to clasp hers as she rested her head on his shoulder.

"I guess we are more alike than I thought." He muttered, before leaning over to kiss her temple. "I don't care about what others think but you're right, it puts an unnecessary pressure on me… Being the Saviour of the Bloody Wizarding World and not being able to transfigure a damn quill into a feather."

Hermione laughed and leaned back. Going into her tutoring mode, she took his wand and handed it over to him.

"Let's see what you're doing wrong."

Harry took a deep breath and flicked his wand clockwise, ending the movement with a sharp stop, just like he had been doing all day. And just like it had been all day, nothing happened.

"Concentrate."

Harry humphed at her advice, his head was splitting because of concentrating so much.

"I am concentrating. But nothing happens."

"Try again, you can do this."

Harry furrowed his brows in concentration, focusing on the quill laying on the table and waved his wand.

Nothing.

"Arrgh! I'm going crazy!" Harry exploded, as much as he could in a library.

"Okay, I got it." Hermione said as if her boyfriend wasn't having a nervous breakdown beside her. "You don't believe anything will happen."

"What?" Hermione's diagnose had stopped his grunting.

"You don't believe you can do it." She said simply.

Harry humphed once again, "I think about transfiguring the quill into a feather. I imagine the feather with all its details and I do the wand movements right. And nothing happens. What does belief have anything to do with this?"

Hermione shook her head, "What do you mean? Believing is everything." The incredulous tone of her voice was what made Harry realise she was serious.

"Huh?"

Hermione sighed at the confused look on his face. "The fundamental of magic is believing, Harry. You have to believe that you are capable of doing it. I thought you knew."

"No one said anything about believing to me." Harry said, waving his hand in the direction of the open book in front of him. "I thought wands and incantations were the fundamentals of magic."

"Well, they are fundamental for doing magic too, of course. But if you don't believe deep down that you can do it than you can't."

Harry scratched his head in confusion. "But why now? I had no problem with casting spells before."

"I don't know." Hermione shrugged. "Maybe you're too stressed."

"More stressed than I was when I faced Voldemort?" Harry asked with a sarcastic smile.

"No, of course not but that was a different kind of stress. You weren't stressed about not being able to perform a spell. You were stressed about-"

"Staying alive." Harry finished, understanding her trail of thought. "Okay, I think I got what you are saying."

They stayed silent for a few minutes, Harry thinking about what Hermione said and Hermione letting Harry analyse the new information.

"But what about accidental magic? I mean… When I was little, I didn't know I could do magic. How could I believe I could do it when I didn't-"

"When you didn't know magic existed?" Hermione finished for him. "Well, there are several theories about accidental magic, especially for Muggleborn children."

"And you think?"

"When we are children, it's our hearts that do the believing and as we get older our minds take the lead." Hermione said with a wistful smile, "Think about it, children believe in fairies that collect their fallen teeth and a fat man that sneaks down chimneys to drop them presents and that they can be superheroes when they grow up. And when they grow up, they don't become superheroes, they become adults who only believe in themselves."

"And if they don't believe in themselves?" Harry muttered, captivated by her explanation.

"Then they are adults who lack self-confidence." Hermione smiled dismally. "That doesn't mean all wizards and witches have self-confidence, Harry. You can't do magic just with pure belief. That would be too easy.

No, we have talent. We have magic in our bones or in our bloods according to some blood supremacists. Maybe in our souls, it doesn't matter. What matters is we have something special in us that enables us to do magic. And belief is what makes us a better witch or wizard."

"Wow." Harry managed at last. ' _How come they never taught any of this in Hogwarts?'_

"Interesting, yeah? But these are all in theory. There are other theories as well. Don't take my words as the sole truth." Hermione smiled as she always did when she talked about something she read in a book.

"You convinced me." Harry laughed, feeling lighter than half an hour ago when they had come to the library. "So you are saying if I can't do a spell that's because in my head, I don't believe I can do it."

"Yeah, basically."

"Then if I believe it, I can do the most difficult spells ever created?"

"Yes."

Harry frowned at her simple answer. "But, Hermione, then anyone can be the most powerful wizard or witch if it's that easy."

Hermione shook her head with a wistful smile, "Believing something isn't easy, Harry. Especially believing in yourself. There is a slight difference between seeming confident and being confident. Saying you can do something and feeling deep down that you can do it is two different things."

Harry stayed silent for a few minutes. Letting Hermione's words sink in.

"I want to try again." He said at last. Taking his wand in his hand, he thought of Hermione's words: Concentrate, believe in yourself, you can do this…

Harry closed his eyes and for the umpteenth time that day flicked his wand clockwise. When he heard Hermione's sharp intake of breath, he opened his eyes. An emerald green feather was laying in the place of his quill.

Harry took the feather in his hands, there was some ink dripping from the tip of it.

"Not perfect but at least an A, huh?" Harry joked. He was grinning with excitement. He had done it. Just a few words from Hermione was what he needed to succeed, it seemed.

Hermione laughed as she shook her head, "Your wand movement is too sharp, do it more gently and it will be perfect."

Harry closed his eyes again and pointed his wand at Hermione's quill. Trying to soften his moves, he repeated his actions and there it was, a snow white feather without a drop of ink.

Harry suddenly found himself leaned back with the force of Hermione's hug.

"I knew you could do it." She whispered proudly, her happiness could be heard from her voice but all Harry could focus on was her hot breath on his neck and her warmth surrounding him from all sides.

"Ahem… Thank you, 'Mione. I couldn't do this without you." Harry whispered back, putting his arms around her. He was enjoying this way too much.

After a few seconds that simultaneously felt like hours and a millisecond to Harry, Hermione pulled away.

"If only you believe in yourself as much as I believe in you, there is nothing you can't do." Hermione whispered. Her smile was so big, Harry could swear it was contagious.

"Well, I believe in you more than I believe in myself and since you're always right… I guess you can be right about me, too."

Hermione lightly slapped his arm, "Like you said, I'm always right. I told you, you were a great wizard when you were only eleven, didn't I? Just think how great of a wizard you're now."

"I still think you are better than me, Miss Books and Cleverness." Harry grinned.

"I was right about that, too. There are more important things." Her tone was sombre despite the twinkle in her eyes.

"Friendship and bravery…" Harry said, remembering her words from almost eight years ago.

"And love." Hermione whispered.

"What?"

"Friendship, bravery and love." Hermione looked at his eyes before averting her gaze to the feather he had just transfigured. She took it between her fingers, twirling it between her delicate fingers. "I was too shy to say it back then."

"Those are the things that made us win this war." Harry said, then lightly bumped her shoulder to lighten the mood, "Merlin, woman! You really are right all the time."

Hermione laughed, "All these years and you're still shocked."

Their laughter died down in a few seconds, leaving its place to a comfortable silence. Harry liked these silences with Hermione. There was no pressure to fill the gap, they could sit beside each other for hours without saying a word. They had acquired this side of their relationship during the Horcrux Hunt, when they were camping all over the country.

Thinking of those days always pushed Harry in a melancholic mood he couldn't describe. He was so happy and relieved that those days were behind them now, that they were far away from those cold forests, safe and sound in Hogwarts. But still, sometimes Harry found himself missing those quite days in a sick, twisted way. He liked to think, for his mental health, that what he missed was spending alone time with Hermione, and not the adrenaline of those days.

His eyes shifted to the window, the sky had begun changing colours from orange to pink to dark blue. The days were shorter now that they were in the middle of winter, more reason to feel melancholic.

"What are you thinking?" Hermione's voice brought him out of his musings.

"It's getting dark earlier and earlier."

"Yeah, until the 22nd of December." Hermione whispered, her eyes were fixed on the sky just like him.

"Oh, that's close. It's nice to know."

"You don't like the dark?"

"Sometimes."

"Yeah, me neither."

Again, silence.

Harry took a deep breath and finally looked at Hermione. She was waiting for him to ask the question that had been plaguing him for a while now, since Hermione told him all those things about magic and confidence.

"What you said earlier, is it also the case with curses?"

"It is even more powerful with dark magic, yes." Hermione nodded. Her eyes were trained on him, carefully watching his every move. But it was far from making him nervous, he kind of liked having her staring at him like that, as if he was a book she was dying to read.

"In the Ministry, I tried to use the Cruciatus on Bellatrix," Harry began, he didn't need to specify which year he was talking about. "It didn't work. I thought it was because I wasn't strong enough."

Hermione reached over and took his hand between hers, her fingers tangling with his.

"I think you are strong, Harry. So strong to go through something like that and still not have it in you to seriously harm the person responsible for it."

"You don't think it's a weakness?" Harry asked, his eyes boring into hers to see the answer to his question. "I felt like a coward… when she said I had to mean them… because she had just killed Sirius, the closest thing I had to a family… and I couldn't even mean to hurt her…"

Hermione smiled wistfully, her other hand went to his cheek to caress it. Harry closed his eyes as he leaned into her soft touch.

"Oh, Harry…" Hermione sighed. "How I wish you had in you to be a coward at times." Harry heard her laugh quietly, "You are the most impulsive, passionate, brave person I know."

"You say that as if it's a bad thing." Harry laughed back, opening his eyes to stare back into her eyes.

Hermione's bitter smile was all the answer he got from her. Harry took her hand that was caressing his cheek to rest on his lap, his eyes following their movement.

"I didn't use the Killing Curse on Voldemort, either. It was his curse that killed him."

Hermione leaned down to catch his eyes, her hands squeezed his as she whispered fiercely, "It was his hatred that killed him." She paused long enough to make sure she had all his attention, "I- I wouldn't think less of you if you had killed him."

Harry held her gaze as relief filled him at her reassuring words. She always knew how to soothe him. Harry settled with smiling to show his gratitude. Saying thank you to someone who admitted they would love him the same if he killed someone suddenly seemed ridiculous. What was even more ridiculous was that he wouldn't love Hermione less if she killed those who harmed them.

His eyes once again got drawn to the sky outside. It was more dark blue than orange now. Hermione sighed and leaned against him. It was an awkward position considering they were sitting in chairs but she managed to get comfortable. Their hands were still clasped together on her lap. Harry slid his thumb across the back of her hand and she turned it over to let him play with her palm. Harry followed the lines on her palm, his fingertips tingling with the light touch.

"You don't have to prove me anything, you know?" Harry whispered at last, breaking the silence. "I already know you are worth more than my friendship. I wouldn't be me if it weren't for you. And I don't mean the war and all that… stuff."

"I know." She whispered, her hand once again clasped around his wandering fingers.

"I mean me… Just Harry," Harry stopped to gulp down his emotions. He didn't remember the last time he'd cried and he knew he wasn't going to cry now. But even without the tears, he sometimes got emotional. Especially talking about their common history with Voldemort. "You, your friendship, shaped who I am. Your belief in me is more important than other people combined."

"Oh, Harry!" Hermione turned in her seat to hug him. When she buried her face in his neck, he felt the dampness of her face. She was crying.

"Hey, don't cry! I didn't say these to make you upset."

He felt the rumble of her laugh against his chest before Hermione leaned back. She quickly wiped her eyes with her hand and smiled brightly at him.

"I'm not upset, you idiot. That was one of the nicest things anyone has ever said to me."

Harry reached over to wipe a stray tear from her cheekbone. "Well, I guess I take it for granted when I think you know how I feel about you." He grinned, "But you do, don't you? You always know everything."

Hermione laughed lightly at his words, "Okay, I got it. I'm a know-it-all."

"I guess more so when it comes to our relationship. I mean friendship-relationship. I didn't mean-"

"I know what you mean, Harry." Hermione rolled her eyes when Harry laughed at her familiar words. "You mean platonic relationship."

Harry nodded, "Yeah, our platonic relationship."

"But you can mean romantic relationship, too, if you want to." Hermione nudged him, "No need to get shy now. If I remember correctly, just two days ago, right in this spot, you were persuading me into a romantic relationship with you. Quite successfully if I'm being honest."

"Successful, huh?" Harry grinned, leaning closer to her. "Why, I'm glad you're enjoying this Miss Granger. I can't wait to prove you wrong on your other reservations regarding my very successful persuasion."

"And what are my reservations that you didn't already prove wrong, Mr Potter?"

Harry's eyes had drawn down to her lips. They looked as kissable as they were that morning. Harry heard her small gasp and his eyes flickered up to meet hers. Before he could say or do anything, Hermione moved back a bit. For an outsider it might seem like an inch but for Harry, that gesture was equal to her leaning back on her chair.

"I'm sorry." He whispered, "I didn't want to make you uncomfortable. I just-"

"Harry," Hermione cut his rambling. She reached over, putting her hands on his cheeks, "It's okay, I understand. You don't have to apologise for wanting to kiss your girlfriend. Unless you do that without permission, of course." She added the last part as an afterthought. "But I just- I want to be sure we are good in this relationship thing before the snogging gets in the way."

Harry frowned at her words, "Gets in the way?"

"You know, confuses us. Makes us believe that this is going good just because we have someone to make out with."

"I don't want to be in a relationship with you just to snog you." Harry could hear the hurt in his voice. If it wasn't for Hermione's gentle caress on his jaw, he could feel worse. She somehow managed to convey with her touch that she knew he didn't thought of her like that.

"I know that Harry, you're not a guy like that. But we're all human. That sort of thing tends to affect our thought process. Especially at this age." She once again caressed his jawline, her eyes went soft as she whispered, "And it's you, it's our friendship at stake here. If it was anyone else, I wouldn't mind having a bit of snogging-"

"Ouch!" Harry said with mock hurt, clutching his heart. "You can't say that sort of thing to your boyfriend, 'Mione."

Hermione laughed at his antics and lightly pushed him, "You know I didn't mean it like that! Anyway, what I'm saying is I wouldn't mind snogging someone even though I knew the relationship would fail. But I can't do that with you. At least not now, it's just been two days. You are more important than a few clumsy kisses."

"Clumsy? I-" Upon seeing the amused twist of her lips, Harry scrunched his face, "Sometimes I don't understand if you're saying something good or bad when you talk like that."

"Too many words?" She was full on grinning now.

Harry shook his head, his eyes once again flickering down to her lips, "No, your lips distract me."

"Exactly what I'm talking about." Hermione's scolding tone was belied by the blush on her cheeks.

Harry sighed with mock defeat, "You're right… Once again. Okay, we'll take it slow." He raised his eyes to hers in his best puppy dog look, "But maybe I can get a small peck, huh? For my successful transfiguration maybe?" He asked holding the snow white quill for demonstration.

"Harry!" Hermione reprimanded him, at least tried to, since once again her smile was taking down the effect of her tone, "What did we talk about just now?"

"Okay okay," Harry sighed, then a mischievous grin overtook his face, "Then you'll come flying with me tomorrow."

"Where did that come from?" Hermione asked, her eyes wide open with fright.

"Come on, 'Mione. It'll be fun." He took her hands in his, "Please."

"Okay," Hermione sighed, she freed one hand to point a finger at him, "But if you try any of the foolish stuff that you do on your own, you'll be in trouble, Potter."

Harry caught the finger pointing at him and quickly kissed it, "Okay, no funny business." He grinned.

Hermione's cheeks turned a faint pink as she smiled back. Just as he was about to suggest returning to the Common Room, Hermione leaned over and pressed her lips against his. Giving him just enough time to acknowledge her soft lips before pulling back.

"For your hard work in your studies." She whispered before turning away to gather her stuff.

Harry stared after her dazedly for a second, his lips were tingling from the brief contact as if there was a mini firework display going on.

' _Or maybe some funny business.'_

Harry stopped her frantic action by pulling her to himself. When she turned towards him, he put his hand on her flushed cheek and dropped a kiss near her lips. Once again feeling all his senses being captivated by the sparks she oh-so-adamantly demanded that they should have a few days ago, he muttered,

"Thank you."

He didn't need to specify, she already knew he was thanking her for always being there beside him. She always knew.

"You're welcome."

* * *

 **A/N: OK, I want to say a few things about the direction this story took. I had planned for (and drafted) this to be a pointless fluff but apparently, I can't write both post-war and pointless fluff at the same time. There is (and will be) talks about life after war and growing up and learning to live after trying to stay alive all your life and love. Mostly love and friendship but with a more serious background of these other topics.**

 **And I'll change the summary, I don't think this one describes the gist of the story clearly. So don't be confused when you see a new summary with the old title, it's still the same story. And since I'm really bad at writing summaries, I'm open to summary suggestions.**

 **Lastly, I got the job I mentioned in my last A/N! Which is a really really REALLY good thing but at the same time it means I won't have much time to write this story with my MA thesis and job going on at the same time. But I WILL write it, I promise I'll finish this story.**

 **OK, that's the end of another long A/N. If you've read till now, thank you! And of course thank you to all of you who have left a review and wished me luck for my interview!**

 **Please don't forget to leave a review, they mean so much to me!**

 **Love you, take care, bye! -xo**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: Many thanks to Lol3hp for giving inspiration for my new summary.**

 **Enjoy!**

* * *

 **CHAPTER 7: Pensive Conversations and Intimate Broom Rides**

Harry slowed down his steps as he approached the young woman sitting under the big oak tree. She had rested her back against its huge trunk, hugging her knees to herself. If Harry didn't know her, he would have thought she was cold. But he was sure his best friend had some sort of a spell that kept her from freezing to death.

His suspicions were confirmed as he sat beside her, close enough to be noticed by her but not close enough to disturb her if she didn't want him there. Without a word, Hermione pulled him closer to rest her head on his shoulder. The warming spells had nothing to do with the warmness that spread over him. Harry put his arm around her shoulders and sighed. It was a long day.

After practising all morning, they had finally had their exam after lunch. It went better than he had expected. _'Thanks to Hermione',_ Harry thought as he tangled his fingers through her hair. She had been silent all day. He had started to suspect that she was avoiding him as he hadn't seen her since the exam.

It was one of those days. Harry knew it. It was one of those days that she just wanted to get it over with. He had noticed it from the look in her eyes when he first saw her in the morning. Come to think of it, he hadn't seen her eyes since that first glimpse in the morning. It was one of those days and although he had missed her, he had given her the space she apparently needed. Occasionally, he had those days too, when he didn't want to talk to anyone, sometimes even see anyone... when all he wanted to do was sit by himself and think.

It was sundown. Harry's eyes got drawn to the frozen lake, expecting it to glitter with orange hues as it always did, however, this time it was dark. _'Just like the day had been.'_ The clouds were hiding the sun, the many colours of the afternoon sky were just one colour today, a greyish blue. Harry hugged Hermione closer to himself, no wonder she felt all gloomy. It was nearly impossible to feel good with weather like this. Or was that because Hermione didn't feel good that he felt the day was depressing?

Harry felt a shiver ran down his spine when he felt Hermione's nose on his neck. She nuzzled him before dropping a chaste kiss there.

"How was your exam?" Her voice was muffled in his neck, her warm breath making him shiver all over again.

"Good." He managed to say. Hermione was making it difficult to think with her closeness.

"That's great." She murmured as she returned to her original position with her head on his shoulder. "Sorry I didn't ask earlier."

"That's okay." Harry murmured back, kissing her hair. "How was yours?"

"Good." A habitual answer to a habitual question.

"How are you?" This also wasn't the question he wanted to ask, he knew she wasn't good but this was a start.

"Better now that you are with me." She was talking softly. If he wasn't concentrating on her voice, he could have missed it.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"No, not really." She took his free hand in her own hands, tracing the lines of his palm with her fingers. "There is nothing to talk about really. I just don't feel good. It's one of those days."

"Yeah…"

"I just feel like… I don't know how to explain it… like… like I'm walking with Dementors around me… like I don't know what happiness is."

Harry didn't say anything, he knew the feeling. He just let her explain it. Maybe it would make her feel better.

"But I know what it feels like… Being happy. I've felt it countless times. And I know I will feel it again. But… Sometimes, I just feel constricted, you know? Like I won't be happy again. It's suffocating."

"Yeah, I know." Harry kissed her temple, "But it passes, we both know that. We went through that feeling before."

She just nodded. Harry looked down to see her close her eyes. Her eyelashes were glistening with recent teardrops.

"We were supposed to fly today."

"It's okay." Harry would have shrugged if her head wasn't resting on his shoulder. He really didn't care about flying when she was crying on his shoulder.

"I promised you."

"It's okay, Hermione. We can do it another time." Harry rubbed her shoulder to reassure her that it really was okay. Hermione straightened and quickly wiped her eyes. So quickly as if she didn't want him to see her tear strained cheeks.

"No, Harry. I promised you. We should do it." He was about to protest when she said, "Please." And he just raised his wand to summon his Firebolt. As Hermione turned her gaze to the castle, Harry turned his to her.

It had started snowing sometime in their conversation and the snowflakes were getting bigger and bigger with every passing minute. Harry gazed at her in fascination as the snowflakes melted just before touching her, thanks to her spellwork. Her hair was sparkling with half melted snowflakes, there were some in her eyelashes, too. Harry realised he liked the glistening on her eyelashes now that the cause was not her tears. Knowing she was crying when he found her broke his heart. Especially when it was because of something he had no control over.

When the broom came to a stop before them, Harry helped Hermione to her feet. As he settled in his usual place, Hermione sat behind him and wrapped her arms around his waist. Harry felt her bury her face in his back.

"Ready?" He asked and felt her nod her head. Harry kicked the snow-covered ground, raising a few feet. He could still feel Hermione's face buried in his cloak, her arms had tightened even more around him.

After a few minutes of flying between the snow flakes, Harry sighed and landed them. There was no need to force this. Even he couldn't enjoy flying when Hermione felt down, how could he expect her to enjoy this?

"What happened?" Hermione asked as they dismounted the broom.

"You weren't enjoying it." Harry said, taking his broom in one hand while taking her hand with the other. "It's okay. We don't have to do this."

"It wasn't as bad as I remember."

"It's okay, Hermione. You don't have to like flying." Harry reassured her. He pulled her towards him by her hand and wrapped his arm around her shoulders, dropping a kiss on her temple.

"I just don't like feeling helpless." Hermione murmured as she buried her face in the crook of his neck, making Harry shiver all over. "But I didn't lie. This was better than when I flew alone. You made it better."

Harry smiled at her words, he knew she was sincere. She would tell him if she didn't like it.

"Let's go back to the Common Room. We can revise for DADA, maybe it will make you feel better."

"Now you're talking, Mr Potter. Studying with you has become one of my favourite hobbies."

"I know you won't believe me but it's become one of mine, too. Especially if we're alone in the library."

"Harry!" Hermione slapped his chest, her scandalised cry was mixed with laughter. Harry felt another wave of warmness burst in his chest. He didn't need any charm to feel warm when he had Hermione beside him.

* * *

Harry sighed contentedly as his eyes swept over the castle grounds. The snow had finally stopped, leaving behind a great sea of pristine whiteness. He was perched on the windowsill of the Common Room, the warmth coming from the fireplace combined with the pinkish sky that was absent yesterday afternoon made for a good day. Not to mention it was a Friday and most of their exams were over. And there was his date with Hermione tomorrow. It was a nice afternoon indeed.

Harry took a sip from his hot chocolate. He hadn't seen Hermione since lunch but he knew she was feeling better. She had waited for him that morning after the DADA exam and they had a nice stroll around the lake before lunch. Hermione hadn't mentioned yesterday and he was fine with it. As long as she was good, he was good.

"Looks magical, isn't it?"

The sudden voice startled Harry. He hadn't heard her come.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you." Hermione sidled up to him and wrapped her arm around his middle. Harry felt a shiver ran down his spine as Hermione nuzzled the crook of his neck.

"I'm The-Man-Who-Conquered, you can't scare me." Harry huffed with mock-arrogance and grinned when he felt Hermione's smile against his skin. "Where were you?" He asked at last, taking another sip from his hot chocolate before passing the mug to Hermione.

"Oh, I was in the dormitory, finishing my studies so I can spend time with you." Hermione said before taking a sip, "Mmm… Thanks, I needed this." She murmured into the mug.

"So, does that mean you're mine for the weekend?" Harry asked in a low voice.

They were alone in the Common Room save from a few first years but he still didn't want people to catch on to there was something going on between them. That was what Hermione wanted and he respected her wishes. Although explaining her close proximity would be really difficult, if any of their friends were to see them.

"Yeah, I'm yours," Hermione whispered in his ear before dropping a kiss right below his jaw. "For the weekend." She added as Harry turned his head to look at her. He could see the mischievous glitter in her eyes.

"Witch." Harry grinned and pulled her closer to kiss her cheek. Playful Hermione was something he was getting accustomed to real quick.

"Careful, Harry!" Hermione admonished him as she balanced the cup in her hand to prevent it from spilling.

"Sorry," Harry grinned and kissed the crook of her neck as she had done a few moments ago. "Couldn't help myself."

As they grinned at each other, Harry's eyes caught onto the object leaning against the wall.

"'Mione?" He asked, his eyes going between Hermione and his Firebolt.

"I want to try again." Hermione said as she put down the cup on the windowsill and took the broom.

"We don't have to-" Harry started but shut up at the look in her eyes.

"I know but I want to."

"I don't care if you don't like flying." Harry tried again. He honestly didn't care. Hermione put a finger on his lips, her chocolate brown eyes digging deep into his emerald ones.

"I want to try again, Harry." Harry grabbed her hand and kissed her palm.

"Okay."

* * *

Fifteen minutes and a few snowballs later, they were once again beside their tree. Harry had decided the best view was there: the castle, the lake and the forest all together. Harry let his Firebolt levitate in front of them as he reached for Hermione and wrapped his arm around her waist.

"I'm asking this for the last time-"

"I'm sure, Harry." Hermione cut him, "Just no funny business, please."

"Depends on what you define as 'funny business' but I promise I won't go fast." Harry laughed as he squeezed her one last time before releasing her to mount his broom. "Hey, where are you going?"

"Umm… Behind you?" Hermione's uncertain voice came from behind him.

"No, not again. You'll sit in the front." Harry pulled her and helped an anxious Hermione to settle in the front of the broom. He placed his arms around her to grip the broom, tucking her tightly to his front. "This time I want to be able to see you to make sure your eyes are open."

"You just want a reason to hug me, POTTEEEEAHH-" Hermione's sentence turned into a high-pitched scream as Harry chose that moment to kick the ground, getting higher and higher within seconds. "I'LL KILL YOU, HARRY! I SWEAR I'LL HURT YOU SO BAD, YOU'LL CRY FOR VOLDEMORT TO COME AND FINISH YOU!"

"I can hear you, 'Mione. No need to scream my ears off." Harry laughed, tightening his left arm to hug her closer. She had slid back to him because of the steep angle of the broom. "And open your eyes, you're missing out."

Hermione shook her head, squeezing her eyes even tighter. Harry was sure if her hands weren't gripping the handle so hard, she would cover her face with them.

"I don't think I can. Just tell me when we land."

Harry laughed at her anxious voice as he halted the broom to a slow stop. They were high enough for a nice view.

"Hermione, come on!" Harry let go off the broom to pull her even closer and buried his face in her neck. Her sweet scent intoxicated him for a moment.

"Harry?" Hermione whispered frantically, "Harry, why can I feel BOTH of your hands?" Upon hearing Harry's laugh at her question, Hermione opened her eyes to check her safety. "Harry Potter! Put your bloody hands on your bloody broom! Now!"

"That sounds dirty coming from your mouth, 'Mione." Harry grinned and squeezed her waist. When Hermione whimpered and closed her eyes once again, Harry took pity on her and whispered in her ear in what he hoped was a soothing voice, "It's okay, it won't move unless I command it. We are safe."

"Promise?" Hermione asked before cracking one eye open.

"Promise." Harry dropped a kiss to her warm cheek. Hermione's spellwork was as good as ever in keeping them warm despite the cold air. "Come on, open your eyes. You'll miss the sunset."

Harry heard Hermione sigh softly. He could feel her body relax against his, he knew she wanted to enjoy this with him but her fear was preventing her. He pressed another kiss to her cheek, just beside her ear, closing his eyes at the contact. He honestly didn't know how he could have gone this long before without having Hermione this close to him. Harry suddenly heard her sharp intake of breath and knew that she had finally opened her eyes.

"Beautiful, isn't it?"

"I don't think I've ever seen something more beautiful."

Harry smiled into her neck. He could hear the sincerity in her voice.

"I have."

"Harry, please don't tell me you were looking at me when you said that." Hermione huffed. Although he couldn't see her face, he could swear that she had rolled her eyes.

"I wasn't looking at you." Harry kissed the hollow just below her ear, making her shiver and burrow deeper into his arms, before whispering, "But I meant you."

"How cliché, Mr Potter." Although her words came out unimpressed, Harry could see the tell-tale tug at the corner of her lips.

A few minutes passed in silence with both of them enjoying the beautiful sunset and the company of each other. The sun had half disappeared when Hermione broke the silence.

"It really is magical. I think I understand why you like flying so much."

"Yeah… This and the adrenaline of going against the wind as fast as I can." When he felt Hermione stiffen in his arms, Harry let out a chuckle, "I promised, didn't I? No funny business, Hermione. We won't fly around. This is enough for me anyway."

"Really? Are you satisfied with just floating in the air? Without all those stunts?"

"Frankly, if you weren't here to snuggle with, I think I'd rather be flying like crazy right now. But I prefer this." Harry squeezed her waist to emphasise his last word.

"So you just want a reason to cuddle me, huh?" She asked with a grin.

"Oops, am I that transparent?" Harry's quick answer made Hermione laugh and snuggle even deeper into his arms.

"This is basically the same strategy as taking a girl to a horror movie."

"Would that work on you, though? After all the things we've seen…" Harry let the unsaid part of the sentence hang between them. He hadn't meant to bring this light-hearted conversation to the war but it had happened on its own. Was there even a time when the shadow of the war wasn't there to darken their days and sometimes their nights?

"We can try and see." Hermione's soft but sure voice broke through his quickly-darkening thoughts.

"I've never been to the cinema before." Harry said, thankful for Hermione's change of topic.

"I guessed so and that cannot be accepted. We'll fix it as soon as we're finished with school." Her voice had that determined tone it got whenever she was planning something serious but Harry could also hear her smile. He pouted as he rested his chin on her shoulder.

"That's so far away."

"Actually, it's just a few months away. And then-"

"And then, we won't ever come back." Harry finished, it felt surreal to say that. "I'll miss here."

"Yeah, me too." Hermione whispered.

Again, they fell into a comfortable silence but this time Harry could tell something was bothering Hermione and she was looking for a way to broach the subject.

"Just say it."

It was like Harry's whisper was all she needed, "I'm sorry about yesterday. I wasn't feeling well."

"I know."

"Yeah, I know you know." Hermione exhaled a puff of air through her nose which could be described as a sad laugh, "I just… I shouldn't have projected it on you."

Harry tightened his hold on her waist as he rested his cheek on her temple.

"You didn't upset me, Hermione. I just didn't know how to cheer you up so I did what I do to cheer myself up." Harry grinned before whispering playfully, "I should have known that flying wouldn't have the same effect on you." Upon hearing the much-desired laugh from Hermione, he continued, "I should have just given you a parchment and a quill and say 'Order any book you want, they're on me.'"

"Now, Mr Potter, that's a dangerous thing to offer me."

They were once again back in their playful banter.

"Oh, I guess I found my Valentine's Day gift."

And as quick as that, they were out of it.

' _Valentine's Day? Really, Potter?! You've barely convinced her to date you for two weeks and you're already talking about Valentine's Day?!'_ Just as the silence was stretching long enough to be an uncomfortable one, Hermione spoke,

"I should step up my game then, huh? How about a carte blanche for a broom ride?" Harry tried to stifle his grin in her curls but Hermione's snort made him lose it and he burst into a laugh. "That came out so wrong, isn't it?"

"I can't say I didn't like how it came out." Harry grinned as he tried to dodge Hermione's slap. Given their position, she only managed to nudge his chest with her shoulder.

"Prat."

For a few long seconds filled with an awkward silence, they watched the sunset. Only a sliver of the dark orange sun was seen now, a few more minutes and the sky would start to darken. Harry was about to suggest they go back when Hermione cleared her throat.

"Harry, could you help me turn around, please?"

"What?" Harry was taken aback by the question, "Turn around where?"

"I want to sit facing you. Would you please help me?"

"Okay." Harry tightened his arms around her when she started fidgeting, "Hermione, sit still for a moment. I will hold your waist and you'll swing your left leg over the broom to sit sideways, okay?"

"Okay." Hermione whispered, she sounded like she had already regretted asking this.

Harry put his left arm around her and grabbed the broom to provide her a support to hold on. Hermione clutched his arm and slowly turned to her right, bringing her left leg over the broom to sit sideways.

"Okay," Harry exhaled, "Now, you'll do the same thing to turn towards me." He let go of her waist completely to grab the broom from both of her sides, caging her between his arms.

"Harry, don't let me go, what are you doing?!" Hermione asked in a panicked voice as soon as Harry's hand left her.

"I was just adjusting my hands to support you. Don't worry, just turn around slowly." Hermione let out a deep breath as her hands clutched his arms. Harry was surprised to see that her eyes were open. But she wasn't looking at the ground or anywhere else really, her eyes were strictly on him,

"Promise me, you'll not let me fall." She whispered as her stare captivated him.

"I promise I'll catch you." Harry heard himself say. Hermione laughed softly despite her nervousness. She finally managed to swing her leg over the broom and sit facing him. She hugged his waist and pulled herself towards him, resting her chin on his chest,

"That's not what I asked but thanks."

"Sometimes, falling can be a good thing, Hermione." Harry finally let go of the broom to hug her again. This was even better than before. Hermione had burrowed her face in his neck, much like he had been doing to her all that time.

"You just wanted to do that, didn't you?" Harry smirked, he was enjoying her show of affection more than he thought he would.

"What? Did you expect to be the only one who is into neck kisses?" Hermione grinned into his neck. "I wouldn't think you to be that kind of a guy to be honest."

"We learn a new thing every day." Harry felt her warm nose dig into his neck and once again thanked Merlin for warming spells.

"Actually, I wanted to apologise." Hermione's murmur came a few seconds later. She had finally lifted her head from his chest to look into his eyes. Harry felt cold at her absence. "And I wanted to see your eyes to be sure that we really are okay."

"There is nothing to apologise for, Hermione." Harry said, staring into her eyes as she requested. Hermione shook her head.

"I acted like a bitch, Harry. I avoided you all day. I didn't even ask how your exam went."

"And it's completely okay. I mean it." He raised his hand to cup her cheek, smiling slightly, "You didn't act like a bitch but even if you did, it would be okay."

"Harry-"

"No, listen to me. You can't be your nice self all the time. You are human, too. Although sometimes you make me doubt it." Harry grinned when his words managed to draw a laugh from her. "I mean it 'Mione. It's okay. Please don't feel guilty for not feeling good. Just tell me. Tell me to stay away or to sit beside you without saying a single word or just talk to me... About whatever you want, whenever you want... Just please, don't you ever feel guilty about feeling down and showing it."

"Thank you." Hermione's voice cracked as she, once again, buried her head in his neck. Harry suspected that he had seen some glittering in her eyes and decided give her a moment to compose herself. A few seconds later, Harry felt her take deep breath and a shiver ran down his spine.

"Mmm, you smell so good. I think I understand how you get that scent now."

"What scent?" Harry asked, completely distracted with her closeness. Hermione nuzzled his neck further, almost making him lose his balance. This was turning into a dangerous thing.

"That fresh air and pine tree scent." Her voice came out muffled.

"I smell like that?" Harry asked, how could anyone smell like fresh air? But then again, Hermione always smelled like books and mint toothpaste and a sweet fruit he couldn't name.

"Yeah. I like it."

"I like your scent, too." Harry murmured as he inhaled her sweet scent, "What is that fruity thing?"

Hermione's laugh made his chest vibrate. "It's peach. My shampoo."

"I like peach. It suits you."

"Thank you."

They were so close. If their clothes weren't so thick, Harry could swear he could feel her heartbeat against his chest. He rested his chin on her head that was buried in his chest and sighed contentedly. The sun had finally set, leaving behind a few rays of dark red highlighting the dark blue sky.

"You know what? You are the first person I've ever flown with on a broom." Harry broke the silence. He didn't know why but he had this urge to just talk about anything and everything with her.

"What about Malfoy? You saved him with your broom just last year." Hermione didn't raise her head from his chest. If Harry didn't know her fear of heights, he would have thought he had woken her up with his talking.

"He doesn't count."

Hermione's laugh once again made his chest vibrate deliciously. "Why is that? He has turned out to be quite a handsome young man, you know. You shouldn't disregard him like that."

"And you shouldn't talk about other blokes like that, no less with your boyfriend." Harry growled playfully. Hermione laughed again, dropping another shiver-inducing kiss to his throat, just below his Adam's apple.

"Don't worry, he is not my type. I prefer dark hair." Harry didn't try to suppress his grin at her words. "Besides, he fancies Ginny, anyway."

"What?" Harry pulled back from their embrace to see her face, his smile dropping instantly. Her eyes were twinkling mischievously. "You can't be serious."

"I think we'll see how serious I am in a few weeks." Hermione grinned. "Jealous?"

"I don't care about Ginny like that." Harry started quickly, he didn't want Hermione to misunderstand. "She is like a sister to me and Malfoy is… Malfoy. I don't care if he is a nice bloke now."

"I wasn't talking about Ginny."

" Then who?" Harry asked confusedly. Upon seeing Hermione's impish smile, he exhaled exasperatedly, "I'm starting to think you have a fantasy involving me and Malfoy."

"You wish, Potter. Sorry to tell you but I'm not the sort to share."

Harry felt a grin spread on his lips, "Good to know we are once again on the same page." He said as he pulled her closer, wrapping his legs around hers to keep her there. "I don't like sharing either."

"Hmm? Is that so? I haven't noticed that before." Hermione whispered as she rested her forehead against his.

"Mmm-hmm, it's also something I've recently learnt about myself." Harry murmured. Their breaths were mingling together, making him feel lightheaded. "I can be quite possessive."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah, about you."

"I don't know why but I like that."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah…"

They were so close. So close, it was hard to tell if they were talking or just breathing the words. If one of them so much as moved a hair's breadth, their lips would finally meet.

"I think I'm going to kiss you."

Before Harry could act on his words, Hermione's lips were on his. So soft and warm but, at the same time, determined.

Just like Hermione.

' _How can a kiss be so demanding and chaste at the same time?'_ Harry thought before he lost all his ability to think because Hermione had decided to nibble on his lower lip. Feeling her playful tongue running on his lip was his undoing as he forgot where he was, what he was doing and more importantly, what he must not be doing. Like closing his eyes and losing his concentration…

"HARRY!"

Hermione's squeak combined with the feeling of having all his internal organs fly up towards his mouth made Harry come back to his senses and he stopped the broom from freefalling after a few feet.

"Oops, sorry." Harry grinned sheepishly as he ruffled his hair subconsciously, making it even more dishevelled than before.

"Harry Potter! You almost killed us!" Hermione exclaimed, slapping his chest.

"You kissed me."

"That's not the topic." Harry's grin broadened upon seeing her blush adorably. She was trying to change the subject.

"I think there shouldn't be any topic other than that. You kissed me, Hermione Granger."

"We were dying." Hermione said with an incredulous sigh, "I can't believe you."

"We just fell a few feet," Harry rolled his eyes, "And it's your fault."

"Oh, yeah? And pray tell me, how is it my fault when it's your broom?" She punctuated her question with a poke to his chest.

"If I remember correctly, you were the one snogging the daylights out of me." Harry bit his lip to keep himself from smiling, she was angry and one would not smile when Hermione Granger was angry.

"Yeah and we had decided not to kiss this early in our relationship." Hermione sighed dejectedly, leaning her forehead on his chest.

Harry squeezed her waist as a snort escaped him, "We had also decided not to tell anyone but, apparently, you have no problem with walking hand in hand or cuddling up with me in front of the fireplace."

Hermione raised her head and rested her chin on his chest, "You're right and they didn't even catch on that something has changed between us."

Harry's eyes darted down to her pouting lips, moist and still a little swollen from their recent activities. He wanted to kiss her again but considering that they were still in the air, he really didn't want to risk getting hexed.

"You make me disregard every rule, every decision I have." Hermione's murmur broke his trance. "And frankly, I don't know why I like that."

Harry's heart soared when he realised she had said 'why' instead of 'if'. "Because you like me." He said with what he hoped to be a charming smile.

The corner of her lips tugged upwards, almost like she didn't want to smile but couldn't help herself. "Let's go back. You've frightened me enough for today."

Harry grinned as she buried her face in his neck once again, obviously readying herself for the descend. "Does that mean I can frighten you again later? Not today, of course, but some other time?"

Harry felt Hermione's smile against his skin. "We'll see."

"So, you liked it? Flying with me."

"With you, yeah."

"And we're still on for Hogsmeade tomorrow?"

"As long as your next question isn't 'Can we fly there?', yeah, we're on."

"Suddenly I don't know how to fly."

Harry directed his broom to a gentle descend as Hermione's laugh rang through his chest.

* * *

Harry opened his eyes with a gasp. The sliver of moonlight fell over his eyes through the little parting of his bed curtains, lightening his otherwise dark bed. Trying to slow down his breathing, he slowly opened the curtains and reached for the glass of water sitting at his bedside table. A shiver ran through him as the cold air of the room met with his sweat-soaked t-shirt. Two big gulps of cold water and a deep breath later, he let his eyes wander over the dorm room. Thankfully, the others were still sleeping soundly. Harry lay down once again with a sigh, covering his eyes with his forearm.

He had hoped the end of the war would mean the end of his nightmares but he couldn't be more wrong. Sometimes, they were even worse than before. He would see the falling of his loved ones over and over and knew when he woke up, they wouldn't be there or even be alive to comfort him with their presence.

Harry's eyes opened at the thought and he immediately sought out his wand from under his pillow, his other hand opening the drawer of his bedside table to bring out the Marauder's Map. He knew this time the nightmare was just a figment of his imagination but he had to see her just the same, to make sure that she was safe and sound.

"I solemnly swear I am up to no good." He whispered urgently into the dark, _'I just want to see that she is alive and safe.'_

His trained eyes quickly scanned the Map to find the Gryffindor Tower. Half of him, the selfish part, wanted to see her dot in the Common Room so he could go down and sit with her. See her face, hear her voice, smell her hair… Maybe kiss her again… She hadn't kissed him again after the fright he had given her on the broom. He didn't know if she was keeping her word on not kissing or if she was just angry with him.

She wasn't in the Common Room. Harry's eyes moved up the stairs leading to the Girl's Dormitory. His chest tightened with fear in that split second it took to turn the page of the Map.

' _What if she isn't there?'_

But there she was, in her bed beside the window. Her dot was so still, he really wished she would move so he could be sure that she was alive. Oh, how he wished he could be there to see her peaceful breathing. His eyes moved to the window beside his bed. If he wasn't sure that Hermione would hex him, he would take his Firebolt and fly to her window.

' _She can't be mad at something she doesn't know.'_

Harry shook his head to get rid of the little voice in his head. He couldn't go to her every time he had a nightmare about her. He couldn't disturb her every night. He had to get used to being alone after a nightmare, he had to be able to comfort himself. No matter how many people he had in the morning, he was on his own at night. Alone in his bed. Alone in his mind. Alone.

His eyes got drawn to the Map once again. He didn't want to be alone. He wanted to be with Hermione. Since they had started dating a few days ago, he felt himself getting more and more attached to her.

' _Who am I kidding? It started way before Monday.'_ He hadn't spent a day without her for nearly two years and he didn't want to.

Harry closed his eyes at the thought. This was getting dangerous. He shouldn't let himself get this attached to anyone.

' _She isn't anyone, she is Hermione. The woman who has never let me down. My best friend.'_

Harry let his head fall back onto his pillow. His best friend and girlfriend. What would happen if she decided to end things with him? After all, she'd only agreed to try dating him for two weeks. What if she decided that it wasn't worth risking their friendship for?

Harry turned on his side, getting comfortable under his duvet. He could tell from experience that it was going to be a long night filled with unanswered questions. His eyes once again found the dot named Hermione Granger, at least he had tomorrow to look forward to.

* * *

 **A/N: Hi everyone, once again, long time no see!**

 **First of all, I wish you all a happy New Year! I hope the rest of it will be better than the first part because, so far, this past month has been a big 'one of those days' for me. Originally, I wanted to give this chapter to you as a New Year's gift but (¯\\_(** **ツ** **)_/¯) couldn't finish it on time, sorry.**

 **Secondly, I have been writing this chapter for months. Believe me, I didn't just ignore writing this and then just wrote it in a week. This shit takes time... and inspiration… a lot of it.**

 **Which makes me come to the third thing I want to say (I hope you are still here), I will finish this story. I'm not abandoning it. I've already outlined the next chapter but I don't know when I will start and finish writing it. All I need is the words to come to me so I can write them down. And I should say reviews are like Accio to inspiration… So please leave a little (or, even better, big) review that will make me put aside my work and start daydreaming about my stories :)**

 **Thanks for reading and reviewing!**

 **Love you, take care and please don't forget that it's okay not to be okay! -xo**


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